Home Depot Is Recalling Ceiling Fans For Detaching Blades. Also, Good Luck Sleeping Tonight!
Well isn’t this just the news we needed? Ceiling fans detaching enough to the point where Home Depot had to recall them. Just when we thought we were safe.
Weird News
How Many Monoliths Did It Take Before Everyone Was Completely Over Them? The Answer Is 3
A third mysterious mononolith has appeared in California, and judging by the reaction, everyone is done caring. In fact, many are annoyed by these things.
A Mysterious Metal Monolith Was Found Deep In The Desert & It’s No Big Deal, But We’re Probably All Gonna Die
WTF is this thing? We have a few guesses, but no they are nowhere close to the truth. Are we in danger? Shouldn’t we be more worried about this? We’rd dead.
Green Ooze Was Found Underground In Toronto, So Don’t Tell Me The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Aren’t Real
In a sinkhole in Toronto, there was discovered to be some bright green slime, which city officials claim they put there on purpose. Sure. It’s TMNT time.
Good News: Dr. Fauci Says Santa Claus Is Immune From Spreading COVID-19
Dr. Fauci announced that everyone’s favorite fat man, Santa Claus, is apparently immune from catching or spreading COVID. Looks like Christmas can continue!
There Are Reports That North Korea May Weaponize Dolphins And I Gotta Tip My Cap On That One
There are reports that North Korea is looking to weaponize dolphins and if that’s true then, well, I don’t know how you overcome that.
Finally, Some Good News About Subway
If you hate Subway as much as A.D., then this news is good news. Subway bread is not actually bread. You read that correctly.
In The Wildest Headline Of All-Time: A ‘Mighty Ducks’ Actor Is A Presidential Candidate & Tied To Jeffrey Epstein
This is honestly the weirdest headline of all-time. The more you read the more you tailspin into a world of confusion. Just read this.
Apparently You Can’t Hit The Taco Bell Drive-Thru Naked, Even If Your Clothes Are In The Washer
You might want to sit down for this one… Apparently you have to be clothed whenever you hit up a Taco Bell drive-thru. Yup, we were shocked too.
A Frozen Ship Was Found Off The Coast of Antarctica, And We Finally Found Out What’s Inside
There have been many conspiracies floated about what this frozen ship found off the coast of Antarctica is, but finally, we have the answer.
Apparently This Is A Model Of What Netflix Addicts Will Look Like In 20 Years
Ever wonder what netflix addicts will look like in 20 years? No? Me neither. But apparently someone did and had models made to show it off.
Ford Is Unveiling The New Bronco On July 9 And Whoops! That’s O.J. Simpson’s Birthday
In one of the dumbest or most brilliant marketing ploys of all time, Ford’s re-releasing the Bronco on July 9th, which happens to be OJ Simpson’s birthday.