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Saturday, May 25, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

It’s Time To Call It What It Is: The Chiefs Are Done

Welp. The Chiefs had a great run. 6 straight division wins. 7 straight playoff appearances. What more could you ask for? Too bad its all over.

You don’t go into Indy, when the roof is open, take the L and live to tell about it. It just doesn’t happen. I mean, I guess everything would have been better if the Colts were who we thought they were prior to the season starting. You know, the consensus team to win the AFC South? Instead, they were exactly who we thought they were when they tied the Texans and got trounced by the Jaguars. They ARE that team. That IS the team that showed up today. And the Chiefs let them off the hook?

So yeah. Time to pack up. Fire Dave Toub. Cut Matt Amendola. Sign him again. Then, when he’s about to board the plane to Tampa, cut him and don’t pay for his cab back whatever god forsaken land he came from. I’d rather have Danny Amendola as my kicker. Also, every special teamer needs a foot broken off in their John Brown hind parts so they can then run a mile.

How about that offense, huh? I guess Orlando’s last name is Brown because that’s the color of his pants after facing this defensive line that tied up his feet quicker than Ciara’s one two step. Good thing they didn’t sign him long term. Sheesh. And lets just go ahead and cut all the pass catchers not named Travis. THEY COULD HAVE DRAFTED GEORGE PICKENS. Instead, they have this dude who’s name is Skyy. And you know why the second “y” is there, right? It’s because he lost the first one in the sky when it was punted to him. Fire Veach. Yesterday.

As for the Defense. Well. They can stay. They played well. As long as they duct tape Chris Jones’ mouth for the next game.

Anyway. The year is over. Time to focus on getting that number one pick now.

*RECORD SCRATCH*

Did that feel good? Was it cathartic? Good. I’m glad. Now you know what the majority of my group texts looked like minutes after the scoreboard clock hit zeros.

Was this loss good? Absolutely not. But at least the best effort was put close, right? Nope. Not even close. But this doesn’t mean that the Chiefs are done. So stop it with that nonsense. No one needs to be fired. I would, however, punt Matt Amendola to the sun and just let Justin Reid kick field goals…

Anyway, just last season, we saw the Bills of Buffalo drop a game to the Jaguars of Jacksonville. You know, the team coached by the apple of Nebraska’s eye, Urban Meyer? The team that ended up with the first overall pick? Yeah. That Jacksonville. Buffalo ended up being just fine.

Another stat I’d like to bring up. In 2022, the Chiefs are 2-0 when Jody Fortson receives at least one target. So maybe just target him once in game? That’s pretty easy to do in my opinion, especially since ALL HE DOES IS SCORE TOUCHDOWNS. CHOO CHOO.

Finally. Lets not forget. The last time the Chiefs dropped their first lost of the season to the Colts in an extremely frustrating game, they won the Super Bowl.

So let’s all say it with Patrick:

MOB

MOB lives in Nashville, Tennessee and is one of the co-hosts of The CineBoiz Podcast. Some would say he peaked in 3rd grade when he led his soccer team in scoring with 2 goals.

MOB