Thursday, June 13, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

We Have An Intern Now… What Should We Make Him Do?

Korked Bats now has an intern. Is he getting paid? Of course not. Is he earning college credit? Nope. Do we even have an intern program? Not at all. So why is he doing it? We don’t know. But we’re not asking any questions, we’re just rolling with it. The only problem is we have no idea what to do with him. He’s proficient in Microsoft Office programs, but we never use any Office programs. We make dumb videos about Derrick Henry and going to Cubs games in outrageous jackets.

And can you believe he goes to Stanford?! So naturally, he’s a good kid and a go-getter, for sure. We just need ideas as to what we make this kid do? When I initially asked on social, some people suggested making him get one of every item off the McDonald’s menu and make him eat it. We’d make him get us coffee, but he’s in Birmingham, and the rest of us are in Chicago, Austin, Nashville, etc. Pretty sure the coffee would be cold by the time it arrived. Since he loves to put the ball in the hoop, some suggested we make him film himself playing basketball, so we can see for ourselves and/or laugh at his white boy jump shot. Who knows? We just want you to help us come up with something for him to do. We don’t want him sitting around all summer twiddling his thumbs. We already know how lazy this next generation already is (as a member of the generation before his, I have to be critical of his generation’s laziness whether there be actual truth to it or not).


Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.