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Sunday, April 21, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

To Us, Cody Bellinger Is Still A Los Angeles Dodger Because His Twitter Bio Says So

Cody Bellinger was recently placed on the Cubs injured list, which is weird, because I didn’t think the Cubs could put a Los Angeles Dodger on the IL. WHAAAAA?!

Yes, Cody is still a Dodger. Not my words. Those are the words of his Twitter bio… which I’m pretty sure is the most binding documentation in all of sports. So naturally, over the past month or so on Twitter, we have documented every day Cody has failed to update his Twitter. Why? First off: why not? People need to know. And second: we’re a dumb sports blog. What else are we going to do with our time?

Now you may be one who says “Who the hell cares?! He’s a Major League Baseball player. He has a few bigger things to worry about than updating his social media platforms” or “He clearly doesn’t live on the internet like you” or “Why did I even click on this link to read this?” If you are thinking any (or all) of these, then you must be as cool as JonnyCoolGuy, who apparently is not as cool of a guy as his Twitter name suggests.

“Who cares” Guy on the Internet is always my favorite. Especially on viral tweets. The irony is so clearly lost on them. But when the “who cares” comes from someone named JonnyCoolGuy, it does make you take a step back and wonder… wait, who DOES care?! Not only did JonnyCoolGuy unfollow us for a single (albeit consistent) tweet, he also hit us with the block.

More like JonnySavageGuy, amirite?! Dude’s clearly pissed that Cody Bellinger is still a Dodger. And judging by his profile picture of the centerfield scoreboard of Wrigley Field, it makes sense.

Anyway, please DO NOT tweet at JonnyCoolGuy and let him know that Cody Bellinger still hasn’t updated his Twitter bio. And that today is May 23rd.

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin