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Wednesday, June 19, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Time To Put an EMBARGO on Comic-Book Movies

Hey Hollywood, We Need a Break.

It’s time to press pause on the production of all super-hero/comic-book related films. ‘The Marvels’ released in theaters this past weekend, to very little noise.

Now granted, this could be because we’re coming off of a SAG-AFTRA strike that killed Disney’s ability to promote the film well. It’s more likely that all of us are burned the hell out though.

Opening weekend was met with very mediocre reviews and a dismal $46.1 million box-office take. I have yet to see the movie so I’m not going to rush to judgement on quality. However it’s clear to see that the MCU is having trouble keeping people interested.

And It’s not just Disney and the MCU. ‘The Flash’ which came out earlier this year for DC and WB also bombed in spectacular fashion, and the upcoming ‘Aquaman and The Lost Kingdom’ already feels like a mess.

What am I even looking at?

It also feels like any new super-hero movie announcement is being met with apathy or confusion.

The trailer for Sony’s ‘Madame Web’ starring Dakota Johnson and Sydney Sweeney dropped earlier today. It looks like it has no idea what it’s trying to be. To the exec at Sony who pitched “Edge of Tomorrow meets Morbius”?—I promise you, THIS IS NOT THE MOVE. Except for the most die-hard comic book fans, I doubt anyone has any interest in these characters or story.

All of this comes in the midst of Disney, Warner Bros. and Sony re-arranging their release date calendars. There also seems to be a new headline every five minutes announcing directors or writers leaving projects.

It’s just exhausting. It feels like we’ve flashed past the “golden era” of comic book movies, and we’re squarely back in the mid-2000s where most comic-book movies released were just nasty crap.

The Problem is Fixable.

My advice, just take a break for 5 years. No more movies, no more TV shows, no more specials. Let us get our heads above water.

Give us a few years of terrible non-comic-book related big-budget IPs and we promise we’re gonna come running back to the theater for your movies. Four or five years of just Fast X (Parts 2, 3 and 4) and Transformers movies will have us begging for more Doctor Strange and She-Hulk.

If you’re supposed to “strike while the iron is hot” let me assure you—the iron is currently colder than the stop-sign I got my tongue stuck to in the middle of winter my 8th grade year.

UPDATE

This news has dropped and a take back everything I just said.

Kenny

Kenny lives in Austin, TX and is one of the co-hosts of the CineBoiz Podcast. When he isn’t talking about or watching movies he can be found kicking it with Mickie the Dog and re-watching the Kansas City Chiefs win Super Bowl 54 for the 25th time.

Kenny