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Friday, April 26, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

The Submissions For Mississippi’s New State Flag Are More Insane Than You Could’ve Guessed

A little over a month ago the state of Mississippi announced they were going to change their state flag. This prompted us to come up with a few ideas of our own. Obviously, since this is a sports blog that takes literally nothing serious (aside from the fact that Derrick Henry is the greatest running back in the history of the human race), none of our ideas were made with an ounce of seriousness. Unfortunately, we did not officially submit any to the governor of Mississippi (or whoever even collects the submissions? I assume it’s the governor. I mean, what else does a governor do?). But if we had submitted our, we probably would’ve gotten at least a couple finalists considering the ridiculous ideas they actually received.

The following ideas are all real, from the list of over 2,000 submissions, all of which you can see for yourself at this site.

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Let’s go ahead and start here. It’s… well… something. Let me see if I understand this completely. This is a Christian catfish, smoking a cigar, drinking a beer and moonshine, and fishing while protecting a front porch that is invested with mice. Oh, and there’s a banjo.

If Mississippi is looking for something different, this is definitely that. Especially considering none of the other 49 states have political cartoons as state flags.

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Ok, we actually made a very similar design as a joke. But someone actually submitted this for real.

Kudos to that person.

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Is that a Christmas tree? If so, I vote yes. Who doesn’t love Christmas and/or the holiday season? This way, Mississippi will have that spirit flying above their state all year. It’d be like that Disney Channel original movie Halloweentown, but for Christmas!

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This flag looks eerily similar to St. Louis’s city flag and–wait a minute. Was this design submitted by Russia? Dammit. First our elections, now our flag design contests?! Leave us alone, Putin!!

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“I like this one,” said the guy who designed the cover of the Beatles’ White Album

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This looks more like the state flag of a Hallmark store. Only thing it’s missing is a Precious Moments figurine.

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This one was expected.

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Picking up some major IF YOU’RE STILL READING THIS IT’S TOO LATE by Drake vibes here.

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As the second most obese state in America, I actually find this flag design to be one of the most recognizable flags in the union. One look and you’d know immediately it’s Mississippi. Piece of cake.

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Ok, this one is just a PowerPoint slide.

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This one is honoring Mississippi’s state bird, the mosquito.

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Lobster and (low) carbs. I can respect it. Probably one of the healthier flags submitted.

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Alright, who let Jerry Jones submit this?

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If I can be 100% honest for a second, I would respect the hell out of Mississippi if they rolled out a flag that was designed on MS Paint.

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Glad to see Mike Leach was able to get his submission in.

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Ok, I love this one… but with only one stipulation. It has to be made on a paper towel. Pretty sure no other state has a flag made out of paper towel! Not only does it exude state pride, but it would also be able to clean up juice spills. More than the leading competitor too!

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Ok, I don’t think this one’s gonna be picked.

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And that was only 17 of the more than TWO-THOUSAND submissions. I’m sure you can only imagine what the others looked like.

To check out the ideas we had, check here:

https://korkedbats.com/2020/07/01/the-state-of-mississippi-is-getting-a-new-flag-so-we-made-some-ideas/

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin

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