Pitbull bought the naming rights to FIU’s football stadium for $1.2 million per year for the next 5 years. That’s right, the FIU Panthers will be playing their home games in Pitbull Stadium. So we started wondering what artists would be good fits to buy the naming rights of SEC stadiums? Here’s what we came up with…

Alabama – Beyoncé

Look, this partnership goes without saying. They’re both arguably the greatest of all-time. And both of their fans are annoying and everywhere.

Arkansas – E-40

Like Arkansas, E-40 is one of those artists you don’t think of first without seeing a list of other people’s work. And the SEC is that list for Arkansas. E-40 is featured on a lot of other people’s songs, but rarely known for anything he’s dropped on his own. Much like Arkansas. Known for being featured in the SEC. But rarely have they accomplished things on their own.

Auburn – Madonna

Just a couple of folks who used to be great, but lately these days, just a hot mess.

Georgia – Justin Timberlake

Definitely one of the greatest, with all the talent being there and well respected, but they certainly both have trouble behind the wheel.

Florida – Linkin Park

A program and band who certainly had its day, but lately just feels like it’s grasping at relevance. Not to mention, both groups of fans love wearing jorts.

Kentucky – Tyler Childers

Their fans are loud, proud, and will argue their important to anyone who will listen, but the general public couldn’t tell you a damn thing they have ever produced.

LSU – Taylor Swift

Everyone will agree it’s one of the best stadium shows you could ever possibly attend and they’re always at the top of everyone’s lists for their performances, but also because their fans are psychotic if you don’t mention them.

Mississippi State – Busta Rhymes 

Like Mississippi State, Busta Rhymes is just kinda there. Does he drop good music every now and then? I guess? But no one is going out of their way to hit up a Busta Rhymes concert. Dak Prescott is basically Pass The Courvoisier.

Mizzou – Chappell Roan

Where in the hell did they come from? Feels like just yesterday they were struggling to find success and we were making fun of them, and now out of nowhere, they’re one of the hottest names around?! WTF?!

Ole Miss – Zach Bryan

Neither is probably winning any hardware any time soon (Grammy’s or natty’s), but they’re just here to provide good vibes and good times, whether at a tailgate or an all-night revival.

Oklahoma – Drake

There’s no denying their success as one of the best for a long time, but lately had a little fall from grace.

South Carolina – Daft Punk

They can be fun at times, but they’re not everyone’s cup of tea. Can they produce a party? Hell yea. But the mood has to be right and it has to be during a Saturday night.

Tennessee – Creed

They had massive success in the 90’s, but fell off for a bit and became the butt of everyone’s jokes. But now, they are kinda having a moment again. Are they cool again? People are asking.

Texas – The Chainsmokers

They think they’re hot shit, but really the only people who like them are their fans. They suck to everyone else.

Texas A&M – Lady Gaga

They really have had trouble figuring out their identity and who in the hell they are, but also because they have had mad beef with Texas/The Chainsmokers.

Vanderbilt – Sufjan Stevens

This partnership is perfect because Sufjan Stevens is one of those artists whose fans feel like they’re smarter than you. But very few people care for or think about their product.

The post Pitbull Bought The Naming Rights To FIU’s Football Stadium, But What Artists Should Buy Naming Rights To SEC Stadiums? appeared first on Korked Bats.

We all know the SEC just means more. But maybe sometimes it means too much? Especially when one of their own is taking the first step of legal action against a comedic sports blog. The Arkansas Razorbacks are coming after this dumb blog for a post from over 10 years ago.

We got an email the other day from a law firm presenting a cease and desist for a blog we wrote in 2012.

2012! TWENTY-TWELVE! This blog was written in a time when we were all whoopin’ it Gangnam Style while we watched Jeremy Lin dominate the NBA in between watching the last Christopher Nolan Batman movie and the first Avengers movie, Disney was buying LucasFilm, Fifty Shades of Grey had all the suburban moms hot and bothered, and the world was supposed to end because the Mayan calendars ran out.

And oh yeah, Bobby Petrino had just been fired for the first time in Fayetteville.

What a time to (barely) be alive! So after Bob was fired by the university for *allegedly* (in case any lawyers are reading) wrecking a motorcycle with one of his employees and former Razorbacks volleyball player on the back of his hog (pun only slightly intended), there was a collection of the Razorbacks fan base that was upset. And by collection, we mean only about 200 people, less than a Chick-fil-A drive-thru.

See? It just means more. So we saw this and obviously -like the rest of the entire Internet- had to make jokes. So we posted the following blog.

If you notice, there is not a single Razorback logo or any wordmark that this law firm linked in their cease and desist. In fact, there isn’t a single mention of Arkansas Razorbacks on the very obviously fake t-shirt that we never sold, printed, or did anything more than just make the dumb joke. Now look, I don’t know if you picked up on this fact from reading this blog, but I’m no lawyer. I run a dumb sports blog on the internet in between the hours of my radio job. So I guess my question is: do we have any lawyer cool kids able to help us out here? Do we have any ground to stand on here? I don’t plan on taking it down unless they want to go to court. Which, in my opinion, would be the funniest legal case since Aunt Becky’s daughter got into USC.

(Please don’t send me a cease and desist for that joke, USC.)

The post Woo Pig Sue Me! Did Arkansas Send Us A Cease And Desist For A Fake Shirt We Made 12 Years Ago? YESSIRRR! appeared first on Korked Bats.

The post Instant Reaction To The Titans Drafting Will Levis appeared first on Korked Bats.

Damn, this one sucks. I think mainly because it came so unexpectantly. But Mike Leach, former Texas Tech and Washington State and now current Mississippi State head coach, has passed away at the age of 61. This dude was a college football gem. As a fan of team content, Mike Leach always delivered. Just stick a microphone in his face and he would spit out absolute comedy gold. Like Will Ferrell circa 2005 to 2011-ish. So in honor of the Pirate, I wanted to share my favorite moments from his days.

“So I’m sitting back there, and so I jump in the pool to kind of cool off, because it was cool to talk on the radio outside. And then I was also getting Fed Ex’s every week, to prep me for the game I was broadcasting. So I get in the pool, and I get out and I’ve got my board shorts on, so then pretty soon every time I get out of the pool I’m sitting on the lawn chair and I got these wet board shorts on so it’s like sitting in a diaper the whole time, you know. So you know nobody is around, fence around, so I think ‘What the heck, I’m taking these things off.’ And so I don’t have anything on, and I get up and I pace, I’m a pacer, I’m pacing right now. And then talking with my hands on air making just really profound points on radio, and I’m very proud of all the brilliant things I’m saying. And then I don’t have a stitch on, and through the gate here comes the Fed Ex guy, here comes the Fed Ex guy watching me pace around naked, talking on the radio about football and all this, and he’s like ‘What the hell?’ and then he hands me the FedEx, and of course I can’t break the conversation I have to keep talking. And the funny thing was, I’ve seen him every week, he never said anything, it was like ‘oh well another day.’ But yep, sure enough.”

via The Jim Rome Show, August 2015

And then there were the quotes…

Who Would Win In A Fight Against Pac-12 Mascots?

Mike Leach Gives Advice On Wedding Planning

Mike Leach’s sage advice on wedding planning pic.twitter.com/d13N53qIP9

— Korked Bats (@korkedbats) December 13, 2022

Mike Leach On His Players’ “Fat Little Girlfriends”

Mike Leach on his players’ “fat little girlfriends.” pic.twitter.com/Z3uVdb3uXh

— Korked Bats (@korkedbats) December 13, 2022

Mike Leach, The Meteorologist

Mike Leach, the meteorologist pic.twitter.com/7D7hYwTNTi

— Korked Bats (@korkedbats) December 13, 2022

All Of Coach Eric Taylor’s Success Should Be Credited Back To Mike Leach

Coach Eric Taylor’s success can and should be credited back to Mike Leach. pic.twitter.com/tt7PyozbtC

— Korked Bats (@korkedbats) December 13, 2022

Oh yeah, and that time he stuffed Craig James’ kid in a shed. Classic! Rest easy, Mike Leach. You will be sorely missed.

The post The Pirate Has Passed: Here Are Our Favorite Clips From The Quote GOAT, Mike Leach appeared first on Korked Bats.

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And because we’re starving artists trying to make this dumb sports blog into a thing, we’ve also got some pretty dope shirts available to remember the greatest Tennessee game since ’98. Click on any of the images to purchase.

Shameless? Maybe, but who cares? 52-49!!!!!!!!1!!!!

The post A Collection of The Coolest Videos & Pics From Tennessee’s Upset Win Over Alabama appeared first on Korked Bats.

Stetson Bennett IV is the guy they talk about in the NCAA commercials who will go pro in something other than sports. As in he will work for his father, Stetson Bennett III, at the family accounting firm, which will come before inheriting the family’s estate and vineyard. This guy probably didn’t see a lick of NIL money, not because he’s a quarterback in a backup kicker’s body, but because frankly he doesn’t need it.

Now sure, there are plenty of walk-on stories like Stetson’s in college football, but very rarely do the walk-ons actually look like walk-ons the way Stetson does. And with a name like Stetson Bennett IV it feels like he got the starting job at Georgia because his father donated a new academic building to the university. It’s just absolutely remarkable. He doesn’t look like an SEC quarterback, let alone a FBS quarterback. He looks like the treasurer of his frat.

Think about the quarterbacks that have come and gone through Georgia without ever winning a natty. Aaron Murray, Jake Fromm, hell Matthew freaking Stafford. And yet this guy did.

More like Stetson Bennet the fifth pic.twitter.com/eSy2jAbMSJ

— Korked Bats (@korkedbats) January 11, 2022

The post I Still Can’t Get Over The Fact That Stetson Bennett IV Won A National Title appeared first on Korked Bats.

If you’re even remotely into sports and/or mustard, you probably heard about what happened on Saturday night in the Tennessee-Ole Miss game. With just under a minute to go, the game was paused because 100,000+ Tennessee fans started throwing things onto the field. الرهانات الرياضية Ok, not everyone. But at very least one guy with a golf ball. افضل كازينو اون لاين So on The Junk Drawer this week, we decided to rank the Top 11 Things Tennessee Fans Threw On The Field.

Check out the rest of this week’s Junk Drawer here:

Or watch the full podcast on YouTube.

The post The Top 11 Things Tennessee Fans Threw Onto The Field Against Ole Miss appeared first on Korked Bats.

Every now and then, college football blesses us with a game of the century. This game is not that.

This Saturday we’ll be hit over the top of the head by a two-by-four that is this Vandy-UConn game. Two of the worst football programs in the country doing battle (if that’s what they call it) on the gridiron to find out who’s not the worst. Do we have to? Unfortunately, yes. I already checked.

So for a game as bad – and unwanted – as this one, the ticket prices are pretty cheap. And by pretty cheap, I mean possibly the cheapest since people wore three-piece suits to games and call their girlfriends their “gals.”

$1

That’s all you need to get into this game. A lone Washington. Four quarters for four quarters. You could still argue that those prices are pretty steep. but it’s just amazing that you can buy tickets to an SEC (note: I use that term pretty lightly) game at a Dollar Tree.

A tin of Altoids – $1.78

It costs more to have a good breath than to watch the Commodores and Huskies.

A gallon of gas – $3.94 (national average)

It will cost you more to go to the game than get into the game.

A cheeseburger Happy Meal – $2.79

At least that comes with a toy.

A fidget spinner – $4

If you really want something that used to be popular that isn’t anymore, get one of these. At least it will keep you entertained.

A song on Apple Music – $1.29

The song will have a good beat, the game just has two teams who are used to getting beat.

Change your entire address – $1.00 + tax

If you’re a Vandy or UConn fan and want to move out of sheer embarrassment, you can change your address through the US Postal Service for the cost of a ticket.

Literally anything else

People complain that you can’t get much for a dollar these days. And, well, they’re right, because Vandy-UConn will not be much at all.

The post Things That Cost More Than A Ticket To The Vandy-UConn Game This Weekend appeared first on Korked Bats.

Derrick Henry’s stiff-arm might be the most feared thing in football. And if – for some reason, it’s not – it should be. It’s more powerful than Thano’s infinity stone glove snap. It instantly turns him into the most deadly running back since O.J. Simpson. But it’s not like he built this IronMan suit overnight. No, this thing has been developing since high school. With its coming-out party in college – when I’m sure many people have their coming-out parties. And it happened on the night of the College Football Playoff Semifinal against the Michigan State Spartans, where Derrick single-handedly killed Sparty. Yes, that pun was intended.

To watch more of our Derrick Henry breakdown videos, subscribe to our YouTube Channel.

The post VIDEO: A Breakdown of Derrick Henry’s Best College Stiff Arm appeared first on Korked Bats.

That rant was after Alabama’s complete and utter curb-stomping of the U in the opening weekend of college football. The Sabes chewed out his team’s effort. They won 44-13. Clearly this man is living on a whole other level as the rest of us.

So after Alabama only beat Mercer 48-14, what is The Sabes gonna say? We locked down a transcript:

In the final 23 minutes and 21 seconds of this game, we were outscored 14-10. We clearly didn’t play a full a 60 minutes. And frankly, I don’t think we’re even close. I mean if we can’t close it out to Mercer, how do we expect to just turn it on against any league opponents. And let’s not act like Mercer isn’t a viable opponent. Mercer has to be short for Ron Mercer, who won an NCAA title in 1996. I wish our guys could win an NCAA title. But it’s September 12 and they’ve yet to win an NCAA title yet. And to quite honest with you, I’m getting sick and tired with the lack of NCAA titles won by our squad this season.

And speaking of basketball. Our school’s basketball team played Mercer in 2017 and they were able to hang 80 on them. Why can we only hang 48? Is that too much to ask? You tell me.

Not to mention, Bryce Young threw eight incomplete passes. Eight. You think that kind of output is going to win us championships? It’s not. Ok? But sure keep singing the praises of a guy who threw eight incomplete passes. What you all are feeding my team is rat poison. Actually, I think it’s more of Tide Pods. Way more embarrassing to consume, and my team is just eating it up like it’s some sort of FaceTok challenge. We are nowhere near ready for this season, and frankly, I’m getting a little sick of it. I guess everyone happens to forget my first year here when we lost at home to Louisiana-Monroe. That was another case of Tide Pods. Everyone thought that since I won a single title at LSU and was extremely mediocre in the NFL that all of a sudden I was going to be great here. But it doesn’t happen that way, ok? Stop feeding my guys Tide Pods, alright? They’re wayyy too impressionable but any hashtag with the word challenge in it. We just need to be better in all phases.

[awkward silence]

*takes swig of Dasani water bottle* Are we done here?

The post Here’s What Nick Saban Will Complain About After A 48-14 Win Over Mercer appeared first on Korked Bats.