Bad news for the rest of the league. I’m afraid the NHL just let Nashville get as hot as their chicken. Don’t ask me how, but the Preds signed Steven Stamkos, Jonathan Marchessault, and Brady Skjei. If you’re one of those folks who “doesn’t really do hockey” well, let me hit you why this is massive for the Preds.

Who Are These Guys?

First off, let’s meet the newest Nashville transplants. The only one’s who moved to town for something other than country music.

Steven Stamkos: Picture Tom Brady on skates. Or at very least John Elway on skates. Stamkos is a two-time Cup champ and has a knack for scoring goals like it’s his day job – which it is, but like he’s really good at it. Dude, can light the lamp like a clap-on. And after he does, you’ll get your clap on.

Jonathan Marchessault: Think of him as the underdog from your favorite sports movie. He might not have been a household name, but boy, does he also know how to light the lamp. He’s the kind of player who sneaks up on you and before you know it, he’s scored a hatty.

Brady Skjei: Pronounced “Shay” (yeah, hockey names, man), he’s the guy who stands between the puck and the net. A solid defenseman with the grace of a dancer but the toughness of a linebacker. Should the Titans look to sign him to sure up their linebacking corps? Look, people are asking.

Why Is This a Big Deal?

This is your favorite band adding three more rockstars overnight. Like if Chad Kroeger from Nickelback, Scott Stapp from Creed, and whoever the lead singer of Hinder is all decided to join forces with your favorite band Imagine Dragons. This is the Dodgers grabbing Freeman, Ohtani, and Betts. But in hockey. Three of the top 5 free agents this summer will now be rocking gold. Here’s what you can expect:

1. Goals Galore: With Stamkos and Marchessault, it’s like adding extra hot sauce to your already spicy chicken. Imagine a top line with them and Fil Forsberg, who is coming off — oh yeah, just the franchise record for goals scored in Preds history. Frankly, we might see the puck in the opposing team’s net more than we see it out of it.
2. Solid Defense: Brady Skjei is like that friend who always has your back. His job? Stop pucks, hit hard, and look cool doing it. Solid defenders is nothing new to Predators lore, but expect to add his weird-ass name to the long list of Preds defensemen greats.
3. Star Power: These are household names for a team that’ll be just 8 years removed from a Cup run that rocked Lower Broad, people are still talking about it.

The Barry Trotz Effect

Now, let’s not forget the mastermind behind this wizardry – Barry Trotz, the Predators’ General Manager. He’s the king Midas of hockey. Everything he touches turns to gold. I don’t want to get out ahead of my skates here, but every move he has made has worked. And worked well. If hockey were a cooking show, Barry Trotz would be the chef whipping up a Michelin-starred meal out of a few basic ingredients and a lot of magic. And we should all just stand back and watch Chef Trotzy cook. And this triple signing on the first day of free agency, just before a long holiday weekend is like your dad stepping back from the grill and saying “Hold my beer,” while he puts another steak on the grill. Or three of them.

What’s Next for the Preds?

Now that the Predators have assembled the Avengers, I’m sure there will be a bit of a learning curve. Your top line has 120-plus goals between them, and last I checked, they still only play with one puck. But the fire on 5th and Broadway is most certainly back. I just hope the Preds don’t continue to outprice the diehards. But I know I’ll be watching closely from Chicago.

So, Why Should You Care?

Even if you’re just here for the nachos, beer, and intermission bands, the Predators’ new signings mean more fun for everyone. More goals, more wins, and more reasons to high-five strangers and chant “IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!” at opposing goalies.

Just let me warn the NHL one last time: do not let the Nashville Predators get hot!

The post I’m Afraid The NHL Let The Nashville Predators Get Hot appeared first on Korked Bats.

Oh boy. The Canucks done and messed up. They let the Preds get hot. You’re not supposed to do that. Look, am I over reacting to one win in a playoff series? Probably. But this is the first playoff win the Preds have seen since 2021, so you know I’m going to enjoy it. Especially with the series returning to the 615. That Bridgestone barn better be creating more hostility than Morgan Wallen on Lower Broad. (Let the record state: This is NOT me condoning throwing patio furniture.) Are the Preds back? People are asking.

The post Do NOT Let The Preds Get Hot! Instant Reaction to Game 2 of Predators-Canucks appeared first on Korked Bats.

We put a poll out asking if we should bring our reaction videos (that we make for every bit of breaking Titans news) to the ice and break down the Preds first playoff trip since 2022, and well, we got enough of a vote for yes to do them. So here we are. And here the Preds are losing the first game of the series. Winnable game? Sure. Frutrating too? Definitely. Can the Preds still win this series? People are asking.

I do know one thing however: do NOT let the Preds get hot!

The post Let’s Do That Hockey! Instant Reaction To Game 1 of Predators-Canucks appeared first on Korked Bats.

But I guess it’s pretty much on par for the way Nashville sports have gone this year. I mean after the Titans nabbed the #1 seed in the AFC, they went one and done in the playoffs. Meanwhile, the Predators far exceeded expectations this year only to poo-poo the bed in round one against the Colorado Avalanche.

If there was ever a year where Titans fans needed a deep playoff run by the Predators to distract themselves from the Titans brutal loss to the Bengals in the divisional round, Tannehill’s hashtag ads on Twitter, AJ Brown’s deleted tweets, AJ Brown’s trade to Philadelphia, Derrick Henry’s lack of workout videos, Treylon Burks not being able to make it through the first day of rookie minicamp, Tannehill not wanting to mentor Malik Willis, the cannibalization of Titans fans on Twitter, Ryan Tannehill just being alive, etc. it was this year. But instead, the Predators were the first team bounced from the playoffs and now it’s led us to a toxic experience online among Titans fans, which leads to tweets like this.

Now, this take was quickly squashed as it is quite the reach.

See what I mean? Just been that kind of offseason this year.

Many people will want to blame Ryan Tannehill. Mainly because people blame Ryan Tannehill for everything. In fact, every day on Titans Twitter there’s a new main character who tends to take the brunt of all hate. Some days it’s AJ Brown, other days it’s Treylon Burks, most days it’s Ryan Tannehill, other days it’s media members like Jeff Schwartz, Adam Rank, or Jared Stillman, and some days it’s just one of us random Titans fans. It really makes this tweet so true… not just for Twitter, but for Titans Twitter:

So while you want to blame anyone in two-toned blue (especially those named Ryan), I prefer to blame the team in town in gold. I love you, Predators, but your timing couldn’t have been worse. Nashville needed a distraction (one bigger than soccer – no offense, MLS… but keep doing your thing, Nashville SC, you’re awesome) to distract us from the disappointment of one of the most promising playoff runs in recent Titans history. But instead, we got literally nothing, and thus, it has led to us Titans fans eating each other like the Donner Party.

And sure, the Preds not only bringing back head coach John Hynes, but giving him a two-year contract extension after the franchise has gotten worse every single year in the playoffs for the past 5 years will help with the Titans fan disdain a bit – because it causes Predators fan disdain – but disdain is still disdain.

Nashville needs something good to distract us like a laser pointer distracting a cat. At least until Week 1 of the NFL season. But instead, we’re still more than 100 days away which means, this long offseason will only continue to get longer. Here’s hoping Ryan Tannehill doesn’t go on any more fishing trips.

The post Titans Fans Have Been Overly Feisty This Offseason And I Blame The Nashville Predators appeared first on Korked Bats.

*sigh*

Unfortunately, yes.

But do we really need them to be? Hear me out. I mean, we were doing just fine before without them, right? Who didn’t love being inundated on social media with trick shot video after trick shot video?! And like having to find other things on TV to watch for the last 4 months was fun too, right? All I’m saying is maybe having sports in our lives is overrated. Or sorry, OVER-RATED! *clap, clap, clapclapclap*

And I’m not just saying this because the Nashville Predators were eliminated in the Stanley Cup Qualifiers yesterday, causing me to wait another handful of months to watch any meaningful hockey for my favorite team again. And I’m not saying that on behalf of A.D., either, who’s Pittsburgh Penguins were also eliminated. (And who’s Pittsburgh Pirates are the worst team in baseball. No bigs.)

And I’m not saying that for St. Louis Cardinals fans who’s team probably won’t continue playing until mid-November, when they stop testing positive for coronavirus.

And I’m not saying that for Vic Beasley who apparently assumed we were cancelling sports this year and just never showed up until yesterday. I don’t blame him for thinking that, because maybe – just maybe – we should.

Oh, and I’m not just saying that because the SEC announced the two additional conference games added to every team’s schedule today, and my alma mater, Mizzou, got Alabama and LSU. And Grit’s school, Tennessee, got Texas A&M and Auburn. Like what the hell?! Part of feels like taking my mask off to try and cancel the college football season. Ok, I would never because my love for college football is stronger than my love for most things, but I’m sure as hell tempted.

Alls I’m saying is, do we really need sports? I kinda enjoyed not having this endless void of pain, humiliation, and sorrow that sports perpetually brings me constantly drowning me in the sea. of life that already finds itself stressful without sports. They say you never know what you got till it’s gone. Well, I never realized just how much pain and hurt and mind-numbingly depression I had until sports was gone. Let’s go back to just watching The Last Dance every Sunday and calling it a week. Please? I’m not asking. I’m begging.

Let’s end sports now before more sad hits me smack in the face like a two-by-four.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

The post Did We Really Need Sports To Come Back? Because I Kinda Liked The Feeling Of Not Having Constant Agonizing Pain In My Life appeared first on Korked Bats.

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The hit he laid on the Predators Ryan Ellis was not funny, but the walk of shame he had to take to the locker room was.

So I gave the clip the soundtrack it deserved. Enjoy.

I guess Right Said Fred also could’ve worked since he was pretty much on a catwalk.

The post We Gave The Corey Perry Ejection Walk The Soundtrack It Deserved appeared first on Korked Bats.

The only thing un-American about this video is the watching hockey part.

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

And also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post The Nashville Predators Are All That Is America [VIDEO] appeared first on Korked Bats.

The Music City? More like The Mucas City, amirite?!

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post Nashville Predators Fan Eats Boogers [VIDEO] appeared first on Korked Bats.

ABC’s new Grand Ole Soap Opera, Nashville, has been a smash success. However, we at Korked Bats feel like the show is failing to show off the great sports presence that calls Nashville home. You know, like the mediocre Tennessee Titans, the often inept Vanderbilt Commodores, and that hockey team they have. Why aren’t they getting any love from the show?

Well, we decided to help out the ABC big wigs. رهان اون لاين We went ahead and cast who we think would be a good fit for each big sports personality in Nashville.

Nashville Predators Head Coach Barry Trotz and The Penguin from Batman Returns. Both of them have been around for a long time, both are short and round, and both of them love ice. 888 casino

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Vanderbilt Commodores head football coach James Franklin and comedian Keegan-Michael Key. Both are up and coming and will probably move on to much bigger things. bwin شركة Speaking of comedy, the fact that Vanderbilt had their new football uniform unveiling in a Barnes & Noble is pretty funny. What? Was the library booked?

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The Vanderbilt Commodores football team and the cast from Revenge of the Nerds. This one is self-explanatory.

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New York Mets pitcher R.A. Dickey (Nashville native) and actor Timothy Busfield. Other than the obvious fact that they look alike, Busfield has acted in numerous baseball movies like Little Big League and Field of Dreams. And coincidentally, his character in Field of Dreams was a huge Dickey.

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Former Tennessee Titans Tight End Frank Wycheck and TV host Ellen Degeneres. Both are married to a woman. Both of them stopped showering with men a long time ago. Both of them have ties to Pixar. (Ellen voiced a character in Finding Nemo, and Frank is a personified version of Mr. Incredible.) However, one of them sounds like a girl. The other is Ellen.

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Tennessee Titans running back Chris Johnson and a mop. Both are skinny, neither can talk very well, and neither are good at staying upright on their own.

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Tennessee Titans owner Bud Adams and comedian Joan Rivers. Both are old, vulgar, and neither has an idea of what’s going on with the Titans.

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post Casting The Sports-Side of ‘Nashville’ appeared first on Korked Bats.