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Russell Wilson Continues The Cringe, This Time With A Subway Commercial That We Turned Into A Horror Movie… Let’s Ride!

@dangerusswilson

Duet this. IF YOU DARE. And get my Dangerwich @Subway #SubwayVault #PassTheSub #foodtok

♬ original sound – Russell Wilson

Mr. Unliiiiiiiiiimited is back to making us criiiiiiiiiiinge. Well, not like he ever really left or anything. I mean, his TikTok is like a collage of cringe. A portfolio of dad trying to fit in with his teenager energy. And the hardest part about watching Russell Wilson’s #content is the fact that you know he probably thinks it’s really cool stuff. Like this:

@dangerusswilson

Friday Night Picks w/ the Homies + @Ciara ‘s Matcha Häagen-Dazs 😂🤣😎 🕴🏽

♬ original sound – Russell Wilson

Why is he talking like that? We know he doesn’t talk like that. Is it because there are other black people in the room? Is he changing his voice to match the company he’s around? That’s a total white guy move. But his voice aside, this is just weird. And I guess we could overlook all of this, as we have in years past, if he was good. But this year, Russell Wilson has made less of a splash than Cooper Rush. He’s Pooper Russ. So we can’t just sit back and allow his content to go untouched, so we turned his Subway commercial into a horror movie. But be careful, it’s SPICYYYY.

Now you don’t even need to watch Dahmer on Netflix because you basically just did.

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter (which he apparently thought was important enough to share here). He also wears pants everyday.

Austin