NFL Draft Translator

The NFL Draft is today, and let’s be honest, it can sometimes be confusing to watch. Especially if you don’t know the lingo. It’s like being in a conversation about Game of Thrones without ever seeing Game of Thrones. Don’t worry we’re here to help. Here’s a cheat sheet on some of the most notable NFL Draft terms and buzz words.
“high motor”
white guy
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“a Wes Welker type”
white guy who is a wide receiver
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“natural athlete”
black guy
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“game manager”
boring quarterback, a la Kirk Cousins
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“NFL ready”
is ready for the NFL
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“potential”
is not ready for the NFL
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“intangibles”
stuff
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“sleeper pick”
a guy who probably won’t be picked high and/or has narcolepsy
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“explosive”
is really fast and/or is a terrorist
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“video game-like numbers”
big numbers
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“I really like this pick”
the person talking really likes this pick
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“playmaker”
is really good at football and/or is Rodgers & Hammerstein enthusiast
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“plays with a chip on his shoulder”
is always angry and/or doesn’t wipe off Dorito crumbs after lounging on the couch
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“goose neck”
this guy has a neck that resembles a goose
(this one isn’t used very often)
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“solid”
good
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“soft hands”
is good at catching and I wouldn’t mind if he caressed my face
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“he sometimes has happy feet in the pocket”
he sometimes has a DVD of Happy Feet in his pocket
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“he can make all of the throws”
he can do what a quarterback is supposed to do
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“can I get more gel please?”
Mel Kiper needs more hair gel and doesn’t know his mic is still on
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“might still wet the bed”
this guy might still wet the bed
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“quick off the ball”
this guy has a fast first step, not to be confused with “quick leaving the ball,” which is just a reference to Cinderella
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“she’s really pretty”
referencing a cheerleader, sideline reporter, or Tom Brady
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“really ‘high’ motor”
Josh Gordon