NFL Discovers All Colts Players’ Egos Were Deflated During AFC Championship Too

January 21, 2015January 21, 2015 Austin

NEW YORK — The NFL revealed findings late Tuesday night that 52 of 52 Colts players’ egos were deflated during last Sunday’s AFC Championship game against the New England Patriots.

This announcement comes on the heels of the announcement that 11 0f the New England Patriots’ 12 footballs used for the AFC Championship game were deflated lower than league rules permit.

Colts officials say the team’s morale is now nearly as low as it was when their starting quarterback was Curtis Painter. “They’re taking this loss hard,” Colts head coach Chuck Pagano said. “It’s really a blow to your confidence when you find out that the Patriots didn’t even really need to cheat to beat you that bad.”

Many believe the Colts’ deflated egos shouldn’t do much more harm. Like a Trent Richardson run, this depression won’t last long. “They’ll get over this by the end of the offseason, so I fully expect we’ll come back next season ready to go,” Pagano said. “And even if we don’t, we play in the AFC South. We could be more depressed than a Smiths song and still win our division with ease.”

The team plans to try and build back up the egos of Colts players by watching a Pacers game. “That should get them laughing again,” Pagano added.

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Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.