Saturday, May 25, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

New York Mets: Now Hiring

I think it’s pretty safe to say that the New York Mets are one of America’s baseball teams that constantly let’s their fans down. No matter how good they look at the beginning of the year, they always seem to screw it up. They’re like the Wile E. Coyote of the NL East.

They’re the little brothers of New York City. In 2000 the little brothers had a chance to win it all, but unfortunately for them they had to go through their big brother. And one Mike Piazza thrown bat at Clemens later, the Yankees win their 26th World Series. Other than an Endy Chavez NLCS catch and various monster trades, the Mets have yet to be heard from since. Heck, the only thing really keeping them in relevancy is breaking news about the disabled list and Keith Hernandez’s mustache. Well, that and this video of Snooki from Jersey Shore way before she was… well… Snooki from Jersey Shore. Back when she was just another orange oompa loompa wannabe from The Garden State with an undying love for sunless tanner Bump-Its hot tubs the New York Mets.

So with the constant downfall of the orange and blue, it’s no new news to know that John Ricco, the assistant general manager of the Mets, is hiring for the Big Apple’s Big Bust.

If you’re like me, this is great news. You realize that the job market is down and that a degree from one of the nation’s finest journalism schools gets you as far as Olive Garden. (Or at least that’s what I’ve learned so far) However, with this recent news that the New York Mets are hiring for any and all positions, my day just got a whole lot brighter… Until I realize that it is the Mets and that I’d probably be better off serving Never Ending Pasta Bowls all day.

Check out this local commercial the New York Mets have put out to find talent within New York:

P.S. If you’re reading this and looking for someone to hire, feel free to hire me. I am a hard worker, I have an easy going personality, I enjoy long walks on the beach, and I have as much integrity as Clay Aiken has flamboyancy. Contact me at austin@korkedbats.com I will do just about anything. Except take my clothes off. I have to draw the line somewhere. I don’t want to get any crazy emails from anyone named Buffalo Bill looking to hire me.


Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.


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