Make Some Mulah! Here Are Gator’s Best NFL Picks On The Internet – Week 9

Another week, another batch of winning picks. I went 8-5 against the spread (unfortunately I forgot the Bears and Saints were playing… oops). Apparently Nick Foles forgot they were playing too, until the 4th quarter when he led a comeback only to lose in overtime. I definitely would have called that, but won’t take credit because I’m too humble. Also, in more remarkable news, I am now 8-0 in games that include the Dallas Cowboys. Take it from my picks, when you follow your convictions, you are rewarded. With that, let’s get into another winning week.

Packers @ 49ers (GB -2.5)

It’s easy to forget that the 49er’s were in the Super Bowl last season. Now they’ve lost their tight end who looks like a white trash pornstar, and their quarterback who dates pornstars. To make matters worse, they’re in last place in the toughest division in all of football. To add insult to injury, they have to face a Packers team pissed after coming off of a loss to the Vikings. I do not like their chances this week.

PICK: Packers 34. 49ers 16

Broncos @ Falcons (ATL -4)

Hmmmm… These are two teams that are hard to figure out. When the Broncos are not playing the Chiefs, they look pretty decent. The Falcons only have 2 wins, but have led in the 4th quarter in 6 of their 8 games. When in doubt I go with the cooler quarterback, and is there a quarterback in the league with anymore awkward white boy swagger than Drew Lock? In my opinion, there is not. So Broncos squeak another one out after the Falcons blow a 10-point 4th quarter lead.

PICK: Broncos 31, Falcons 27

Seahawks @ Bills (SEA -3)

The Bills did it. They stood up to the school yard bully of the AFC East, and won. Yes, it didn’t look good for them and it took a horrible Cam Newton fumble for them to hold on but hey, if no one sees the bully slip on a banana peel, and only sees you standing over his knocked out figure, it’s still a win. Hopefully the bully doesn’t remember how he lost the next time you see him, and finally earn enough respect for them to leave you alone. That was a weird analogy just for me to tell you their about to get humbled in a big way by Russ and the Seahawks.

PICK: Seahawks 34, Bills 20

Bears @ Titans (TEN -6)

In many people’s minds, this is the battle of the the most overrated teams in their respective conferences. The Bears look set to be on their second quarterback controversy of the season. The Titans just loss to the Bengals who are missing their entire offensive line. Yet, both these teams seem like locks to make the playoffs. I love this matchup for that. Someone could go out and prove the country wrong with a big statement blowout…. ORRRRRRRR, a team could drive down at the end of the game and lose on a 39-yard missed field goal. I’ll go with the latter.

PICK: Titans 19, Bears 17

Ravens @ Colts (BAL -3.5)

Fun fact; The Ravens and the Colts have the same record. Don’t believe me? Click here for proof. Crazy right?!?! Now that I’ve got your attention, let’s take a look at these pesky Colts. Turns out that with a great offensive line, Philip Rivers can do just enough to win games as long as his defense holds the other team under 20 points. People make fun of game managers all of the time, but hey, it beats having Ben DiNucci. I don’t know what’s up with Lamar Jackson (return of the Madden Curse), but something isn’t right there. I think I smell an upset!

PICK: Ravens 17, Colts 21

Panthers @ Chiefs (KC -11.5)

I’m happy for Andy Reid. For most of my life, it felt as though he and the Eagles were destined to never win the Super Bowl. Now, both parties have one ring, and Reid looks as though he poised to coach the next great dynasty in the NFL. Anyone who doesn’t think Mahomes is the best player in the NFL is either not paying attention or smoking crack. Even when he has bad games the Chiefs seem to still win comfortably. Unfortunately for the Panthers, I don’t think he’s gonna have a bad game this week.

PICK: Panthers 14, Chiefs 35

Lions @ Vikings (MIN -3)

The Lions are ahead of the Vikings in the standings, but I think most would agree that the Vikings are the better team. Now that they have Dalvin Cook healthy, they’re a team that no one really wants to face. The Lions, on the other hand, have Matt Patricia as their coach. The Vikings will win as long as Kirk Cousins does more handing off than throwing. Maybe just keep Cousins off the field and run the whole game in the wildcat formation.

PICK: Lions 24, Vikings 37

Giants @ Football Team (WAS -3.5)

Yes, the Giants are 1-7, but I’m gonna step out on a limb and say they’re a good 1-7 team. Yes, that is an oxymoron, but the Giants have lost 5 of 7 by only 1 score including the last two weeks where they lost to two division leaders by a combined 3 points. Football is a game of inches, and unfortunately for the Giants the inches have gone the wrong way this year. However, one bright side is that their one win this year comes against the Football Team. I think they double their W’s, and become the first team in NFL history to beat the Football Team twice in one season.

PICK: Giants 27, Football Team 22

Texans @ Jaguars (HOU -7)

A lot of people predicted that the Jaguars would be a horrible team this year, but anyone who tells you they saw the Texans starting the season 1-6 would be lying. Yes, DeShaun Watson got paid, but you really have to feel for the man. Imagine having one of the greatest targets in the NFL just for your loser coach to trade him away for an over the hill running back… Sad stuff. Based on the talent on the field, the Texans should blow the Jags out. However, I think there might be a little bit of Minshew Magic left in Duvall. Not enough to win, but probably enough to cover.

PICK: Texans 30, Jaguars 26

Raiders @ Chargers (LV -.5)

This is a tough one. If you’ve followed my picks each week, you know I love me some Justin Herbert. However, I’m afraid the relationship has grown toxic. Once again, Herbert failed to put away a team and lost another heartbreaker. The Raiders are quietly in the wildcard hunt in the AFC, and Derek Carr is on a mission to save the family name. I know I’ll regret this but I’m rolling with Vegas.

PICK: Raider 27, Chargers 24

Steelers @ Cowboys (PIT -14)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh my gosh. The 2020 Cowboys are the gift that keep on giving. People in Philadelphia wanted to focus on how bad the Eagles looked on Sunday night. I however, relished in how tremendously terrible the Cowboys were. The Eagles had 4 turnovers, were 0-3 on 4th down conversions, and had under 250 total yards of offense, and still won by 2 touchdowns. If I were Jerry Jones, I would fire myself as GM. I’d also be really old, gross, and racist. Steelers by a million.

PICK: Steelers 42, Cowboys 0

Dolphins @ Cardinals (ARZ -5.5)

Tua Time started with a bang! A huge blowout win against the Rams is impressive, but let’s see how he does out west. Both these teams seem to be playing above their expectations, but there’s a major difference between the two. What’s that difference? Kyler Murray. Yes, Tua has a lot of potential, but Kyler is a sleeper pick for MVP this year, and the only quarterback to out-duel Russel Wilson this year. I think he does it again this week.

PICK: Dolphins 24, Cardinals 31

Saints @ Buccaneers (TB -4.5)

The most annoying part of last Sunday, was that Fox ran a banner throughout the whole Saints game with the “Breaking News” that Brees had passed Brady for most all time touchdowns… Cool. The record held for one day when Brady came out the next day and passed Brees right back. Right now Brady leads Brees by 1 touchdown going into their matchup this weekend. I don’t know who will end their career with the record, but I do know Mahomes will pass both of them by the end of his career. For this week, I think Brady gets the upper hand but the Saints cover.

PICK: Saints 30, Bucs 33