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Saturday, April 13, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Injured? Ouch. Embarrassing Injury? Ouch Ouch.

This morning I got up, walked my dog without stepping in poop, showered without dropping the soap, cleaned my ears without puncturing my ear drum, and then I even got dressed without stepping on a pant leg.  Then it happened.  As I was closing my door to leave, my pinky finger got caught in a pant loop and the rest was history. I do a lot of typing at work so I may have to miss the next several days because my productivity will be way down without the full range of motion in my money maker.

What is my motive for speaking out about this mishap?  I thought I would come clean before the media has a field day when I don’t show up at the office.  It’s better to be honest upfront than to have a bunch of false rumors in the tabloids. Anyways, to make myself feel better I searched for some other famous athletes like myself who experienced something similar in the way of “embarrassing injuries. 888 casino

Ricky Henderson sat out games in the 1985 season due to frostbite.  “But Langley, baseball isn’t played during the winter. betfinal عربي ”  I know…

Denny McLain, a wonderful pitcher for the Tigers in the 60’s, missed games with a foot injury.  He claimed to have gone to bed with no signs of a problem and then woke up with four dislocated toes. لعب البوكر  Nearly 50 years later, Paranormal Activity hit the big screens to retell his chilling accounts but got a little carried away.

Chris Snyder, a catcher for the Arizona Diamondbacks, was injured behind the plate in 2008 when a foul ball tipped off of Corey Hart’s bat and unfortunately broke Snyder’s testicle. First of all, how do you break something with the same texture and density of an overcooked meatball?  Wouldn’t it be considered squashed or mashed?  Second of all, whoever bought the youth sized cup for him should be fired.

Finally, Jose Guillen missed spring training with the Kansas City Royals in 2009 after having surgery on his toe.  What was the injury?  Pretty standard;  an ingrown toenail that he tried to rip out with tweezers himself after the doctor told him he would need surgery.  I think it is safe to say pride got in the way on this one.

I must admit, I feel a lot better now.  Besides, my belt loops are abnormally large.  I am demanding a product recall.

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