Build Your Bank! Here Are Gator’s Best NFL Picks On The Internet – Week 8
We’re at Week 8 of the NFL season, and a lot has changed since the summer. The Dodgers are World Series Champions, the Cowboys are on their 3rd string quarterback, and OBJ likes to get pooped on. Cool stuff. One thing that remains the same is our winning picks! Last week we went 8-6 and still have yet to have a losing record! Who else can say that? Probably no one! With that, here are the picks you love the most.
Falcons @ Panthers (CAR -3)
It’s really a bad time to be a citizen of the great city of Atlanta. Not even getting into the voter suppression that forces citizens to wait up to 8 hours to vote, I’m only referring to their sports teams who aren’t just losers, they’re the biggest chokers of all time. The only saving grace for the Braves blowing a 3-1 lead to the Dodgers is that the Falcons choke harder and louder on a weekly basis. Everyone has been giving Todd Gurley a hard time for SCORING A GO-AHEAD TOUCHDOWN, and completely ignoring that all the defense had to do was keep the Lions from scoring a touchdown with 1 minute left and only 1 timeout. C’mon people. I feel bad for Atlanta, so I’ll give them a win against my better judgment.
PICK: Falcons 31, Panthers 30
Raiders @ Browns (CLE -3)
It’s a real shame about OBJ. Real shitty thing when a star goes down like that. Baker Mayfield had a really good game last week, which means he’ll be absolutely horrible this week and hand Oakland the win. The sooner Cleveland realizes that Baker is a bad quarterback, the better. Cleveland is an extremely talented team held back by a below-average quarterback. I don’t wish ill on Cleveland because they have enough to worry about, but your team will not go any further than the first round of the playoffs with Baker as QB and that’s a shame.
PICK: Raiders 30, Browns 20
Colts @ Lions (IND -2.5)
The Lions sit at 3-3, but I promise you, they are not a good team. The Colts sit at 4-2, and I don’t know what to make of them. This is the game that no one outside of Detroit or Indianapolis will watch, and RedZone will only show a few seconds when these teams score. If a tree falls in a forest, and no one’s there to hear it, does it make a sound? If a mediocre football team wins a game with no one watching, does it matter? I wish I knew the answers to these deep questions, but alas, I’m just Gator.
PICK: Colts 24, Lions 21
Steelers @ Ravens (BAL -3.5)
This is the game that everyone wants instead of the Eagles v. Cowboys game. I’ve gotta say, for a country that supposedly hates Dallas, it sure hasn’t felt like it. First, all of the pity for Prescott and Dalton, and now America doesn’t want to see them get destroyed in primetime? America, you have gotten soft. Anyways, this is a great game, but I feel like the Steelers’ luck has to run out eventually. Baltimore takes the win, and takes over 1st in the AFC North.
PICK: Steelers 23, Ravens 34
Patriots @ Bills (BUF -3.5)
Well, well, well. Turns out the Patriots aren’t that good without Tom Brady. I, for one, am shocked. I’ve spent this whole year talking trash on Brady, and predicting New England wins, and now must admit I was wrong. Brady is still overrated, but the Patriots do suck without him. This game is absolutely huge for the AFC East. If the Bills win, it almost guarantees that the Patriots won’t win the division for the first time in 10,000 years. It makes me nervous to pick against New England and write the Patriots off based on the last 20 years, but I’m taking the leap! Bills big!
PICK: Patriots 10, Bills 31
Jets @ Chiefs (KC -20)
The Jets are no longer the worst team in the NFL! How? Although they have yet to win, they actually covered against the Bills bringing their record against the spread to 1-6. The only team with a worse record? You guessed it! The Dallas Cowboys who are 0-7 ATS. Can the Jet’s make it two covers in a row? Probably not, as the Chiefs seem to be catching their stride.
PICK: Jets 6, Chiefs 34
Vikings @ Packers (GB -6.5)
Let’s go all the way back to week 1 when these teams first met. At the beginning of the season, the Vikings were actually favored against the Packers, and the favorite to win the NFC North. Halfway through the season and the Vikings are 1-5, and the Packers are looking at potentially being the 1-seed in the NFC. I truly believed Kirk Cousins cursed his whole team when he made his wild comments about COVID. We’ll see more proof of the curse this week when they get trashed by Green Bay.
PICK: Vikings 17, Packers 34
Rams @ Dolphins (LAR -4)
The Tua era begins! Although Fitzpatrick was forcing his way into the MVP discussion after a huge month of October, he was benched for the budding star over the BYE week. It’s a real shame for the Harvard Grad, but at least he can fall back on the fact that he has a degree from an Ivy League school! In all honesty, the Dolphins should trade him to the Patriots too see if Fitzmagic can carry New England into the playoffs. It’s only right. I’m not gonna pick Tua before I see him play, even though he’s probably better than Goff.
PICK: Rams 30, Dolphins 23
Titans @ Bengals (TEN -5.5)
I officially hate Steven Gostkowski. Last week, I predicted that the Steelers and Titans would tie 27-27. With less than a minute left, the score was 27-24 and Gostkowski decided it was time to miss a field goal. What a frickin’ joke. I’m out here putting my heart on the line with these picks, and I go with a tie and this frickin’ guy can’t make a 40-something yard field goal. What a joke. I really deserved better than that, and he should be cut. If he’s still on the roster by Sunday, the Titans will lose.
PICK: Titans 20, Bengals 28
Chargers @ Broncos (LAC -3)
Justin Herbert finally got his first win! Now he’s a lock for Rookie of the Year! My favorite player who isn’t an Eagle finally proved he has what it takes to beat horrible teams like the Jaguars. Hooray! Guess what? The Herbert Train is leaving the station and ready to run over anyone in it’s way. Chargers by a lot!
PICK: Chargers 34, Broncos 19
49ers @ Seahawks (SEA -3)
Wow. Anyone who went to bed on Sunday night thinking the Seahawks had the game won must have been shocked when they woke up to see that Arizona had come back to win in overtime. What was even more shocking was that Russ had 3 really bad interceptions. One of which should have been a pick six, but DK Metcalf is an absolute freak of nature. No way Seattle loses back-to-back games though. Sorry, Jimmy.
PICK: 49ers 28, Seahawks 38
Cowboys @ Eagles (PHI -7)
This is one of the most exciting weeks of the year in Philadelphia: Cowboys Week. What makes it better this year is that they’re an absolute dumpster fire! Wow, I love watching the Dallas fans cry over a dirty hit on Dalton when they were the same fans who made fun of Wentz last year after he went out with a concussion after human trash can Jadeveon Clowney delivered a late hit on a defenseless quarterback. This season is proof that God is real and He hates the Cowboys. Life is good when the Cowboys are bad, and boy do they blow. Great times besides the fact that it’s 2020.
PICK: Eagles 31, Cowboys 3
Buccaneers @ Giants (TB -11.5)
I don’t want to say this, but maybe Tom Brady isn’t so bad after all. Although he has more weapons around him than any other quarterback in the league, I have to say he’s playing well. I think this proves that he’s at least a decent quarterback. On the other side of this match up. You have a quarterback who literally can’t run in a straight line without tripping over his own feet. What a doofus. We’re going with the Bucs but Giants cover.
PICK: Bucs 31, Giants 20
