Who NOT To Start – Week 6

You can go just about anywhere on the World Wide Web to receive fantasy football advice for who you should start every week. However, there is only one place on the World Wide Web where you can go to receive fantasy football advice of who you SHOULD NOT start every week. And that place is KorkedBats.com. You’re welcome.

Week 6

Well, here we are 38% of the way through the NFL regular season. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like that first 38% always flies by. In fact, I’d say that the first 38% goes faster than the next 18%. If you have been reading our Who NOT To Start column every week, then by this point in the season, you should already have at least a 7 game lead in your fantasy football league. Now you may be saying, “But, it’s not even mathematically possible to have a 7 game lead heading into Week 6.” And to that I say, “Why don’t you leave your calculator at home, nerd. This isn’t calculus class. This is fantasy football.” (which may or may not be a good comeback.)

The point being is… If you’ve implemented our advice into your fantasy football roster, then you should be winning your league by a substantial margin. If you’re not in first place, then you probably haven’t implemented our advice and you only have yourself to blame. Well, yourself and Calvin Johnson, because what the heck, Calvin? You’ve been sucking this year.

This week, we strongly encourage you to NOT start St. Louis Rams long-snapper Jake McQuaide. Now, I’m not saying no one knows who Jake McQuaide is, but even his own mother forgets his name every once in a while. Jake was signed as an undrafted free agent in 2011, and that pretty sums up his entire NFL career. Well, that and these few photo highlights:

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you shouldn’t start Jake McQuaide because he’s irrelevant. If that was the case, I’d tell you to never start any Tennessee Titans. I’m just saying you shouldn’t start Jake McQuaide because he’s a long snapper. Some fantasy leagues offer a FLEX position option and other leagues offer a WR/RB position option, while very few leagues offer a WR/Long Snapper position as an option. If you are in one of those latter leagues, still don’t start Jake McQuaide. Personally, I’d probably go with Andrew Depaola from the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, or at very least, Cullen Loeffler from the Minnesota Vikings.

Again, please note that I’m not saying you shouldn’t start Jake McQuaide because he’s irrelevant, and I’m not saying you shouldn’t start him because he’s a long snapper. Heck, I’m not even saying you shouldn’t start him because he’s got red hair.

I’m saying you shouldn’t start him because he went to Ohio State.

Check back next week for more advice on Who NOT To Start.

Previous Who NOT To Start Posts: Week 2, Week 3, Week 4, Week 5

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats