Lock it in right now, people. The 76ers are winning the 2021 NBA Finals. Wrap this fake illegitimate bubble up as soon as possible so we can get to a full season that actually counts. Honestly, if Lebron wins this one it really shouldn’t count due to all of the crazy circumstances.

Now the 76ers have a lot to clean up to do, including somehow getting rid of Al Horford and adding to our non-existent bench, but Doc Rivers should be able to fix the other most pressing problems.

First off, as a real coach and not just Ben Simmons’ dad’s friend (still bitter about Brett Brown), he will be stern with the young point guard. Now that Doc is the head coach, we will actually see a development in Ben Simmons’ jump shot. How can I be so sure? I know for a fact that Rivers won’t hesitate to sit Ben’s ass if he doesn’t listen to Rivers’ instruction to shoot the damn ball.

Secondly, he will create an offense that actually compliments the talent the 76ers have. Some of the 76ers’ biggest problems occurred because Brett Brown believed an offense could work with an all-star center staying outside of the paint taking intermediate 3’s while the point guard only took shots inside of the paint. This backwards logic will never again be tried in the NBA. Why? Because no one as dumb as Brett Brown will ever be a head coach.

Finally, Doc Rivers will know not to take out Joel Embiid on an arbitrary schedule that completely ignores the ebbs and flow of a basketball game. There were points last season when Embiid looked unstoppable only for his own coach to pull him from the game.

Without Brett Brown’s generally horrible coaching and potentially evil motives With Doc Rivers at the helm of the Sixers immense talent and potential, there will be no stopping them from raising the Larry O’Brien trophy in 2021 thus completing the process.

Can’t wait for 2020 to be over!

The post Doc Rivers Brings Something To The 76ers They’ve Been Missing For Years: An Actual Coach appeared first on Korked Bats.

In the first College Football Playoff, Florida State Seminoles got routed by Oregon Ducks, 59-20, the Ohio State Buckeyes whooped Alabama Crimson Tide, 42-35, and the Buckeyes went onto win it all against the Ducks, 42-20.

Here are a few headlines you probably won’t see in the papers today.

National Championship: Ohio State 42, Oregon 20

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And now for the rest of the College Football Playoff games…

Sugar Bowl: Ohio State 42, Alabama 35

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The Rose Bowl: Oregon 59, Florida State 20

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post HEADLINES – College Football Playoff Edition [UPDATED] appeared first on Korked Bats.

LeBron James recently announced that he will be leaving Miami and rejoining the Cleveland Cavaliers. Here are a few headlines you probably won’t see in the Miami Herald today:

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post 15 LeBron James Headlines You Probably Won’t See From The Miami Herald appeared first on Korked Bats.

The Alabama Crimson Tide lost their second straight game in the Allstate Sugar Bowl against the Oklahoma Sooners last night. Here are a few headlines you probably won’t see in the papers today:

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post HEADLINES – Alabama Loses In The Sugar Bowl appeared first on Korked Bats.

The Alabama Crimson Tide won their second straight BCS National Championship last night. Here are a few headlines you probably won’t see in the papers today:

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post HEADLINES – 2013 BCS National Championship appeared first on Korked Bats.

Yesterday, the Denver Broncos waived backup quarterback Kyle Orton in a move as questionable as Tim Tebow’s throwing motion. Here are some newspaper headlines that you probably won’t see…

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

And also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post Headlines – Broncos Cut Kyle Orton appeared first on Korked Bats.

The St. Louis Cardinals won the World Series last night, with a 6-2 win over the Texas Rangers in Game 7. Here are a few headlines you probably won’t see in the papers today:

The post Headlines – St. Louis Cardinals Win The World Series appeared first on Korked Bats.

Yesterday morning, THE Ohio State’s head football coach, Jim Tressel, stepped down due to the massive mounts of NCAA infractions surrounding him and his program. Here are some headlines that you probably won’t see in the newspapers…

The post Headlines – Jim Tressel Resigns appeared first on Korked Bats.

The Oklahoma City Thinder defeated the Memphis Grizzlies, 105-90, in Game 7 to advance to the Western Conference Semifinals for the first time in Oklahoma City’s short history. These are some headlines you probably won’t see in the papers…

The post Headlines – Thunder Beat Grizzlies appeared first on Korked Bats.

Everyone’s favorite chest-painting, women’s college basketball supporting, Jewish basketball coach has been fired. It was discovered Monday afternoon that the University of Tennessee was going to cut ties with head coach Bruce Pearl. All because he lied to the NCAA. It’s a shame too, because Pearl amounted for a 145-61 record while in Knoxville. It just goes to show you that no matter how good you are, you can still get fired. However, don’t get yourself down, Bruce Pearl. You can always take up baseball. It’s a lot easier to get away with cheating in that sport.

With all this news surrounding Bruce Pearl, here are some headlines that you probably won’t see in the papers…

The post Headlines – Bruce Pearl is Fired appeared first on Korked Bats.