Who NOT To Start – Week 9

You can go just about anywhere on the World Wide Web to receive fantasy football advice for who you should start every week. However, there is only one place on the World Wide Web where you can go to receive fantasy football advice of who you SHOULD NOT start every week. And that place is KorkedBats.com. You’re welcome.

Week 9

It’s that time of year in the fantasy football schedule where it’s time to try new things. What you’ve been doing all year hasn’t worked. I’m going to be honest with you. In fact, you might want to sit down for this. You’re fantasy football team sucks. You had multiple weeks of disappointment. Remember that one week when you lost to a guy who started a running back who was on a BYE week? Gah, you’re terrible. If your fantasy league was a bunch of bands, your team would be Hinder. If your fantasy league was a bunch of movies, your team would be M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening. If your fantasy league was a bunch of pop stars, your team would be Jamie Lynn Spears. The point being, your team has been a huge disappointment this year.

So like it was stated earlier, you need to try new things. So just trust us and go with us on this.

This week, you should NOT start everybody. That’s right. Bench everybody. I want there to be fewer names on your starting roster than the Tennessee Titans’ full roster. Now, you’re probably thinking, “But how are we ever going to score points with no one on our starting roster?” Well, first, your not going to. This is what we call strategy. You might think it’s dumb strategy, but it’s better than your “start players with the highest projected scores based on my fantasy league website’s best guess” strategy. Plus, the team your playing will probably be freaked out that you don’t have anyone on your starting roster, and they’ll just keep fumbling the ball over and over, leading to negative points, and giving you the win!

Either that or you’ll lose 106 to 0.

So take the risk, live a little, and try our strategy. Trust us. We have a sports website, do we’re clearly experts.

Check back next week for more advice on Who NOT To Start.

Previous Who NOT To Start Posts: Week 2, Week 3, Week 4, Week 5, Week 6, Week 7, Week 8

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This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats