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Texas A&M’s New Football Facilities Are Breathtaking [VIDEO]

Texas A&M recently opened up their brand new football facilities, and they are, in a word, GEWWWWWW!

A few thoughts:

  • You’re probably going to have to consult a physician 4 hours after watching this video.
  • This entire facility was funded by the money Johnny Manziel made from autographs last season.
  • Was hoping this video would at least explain what “Gig ‘Em” means.
  • Xzibit be like, “We heard you like TV’s, so we put TV’s inside your TV’s. Also, a barber shop in the locker room.”
  • The only thing this locker room is missing is three precogs who can see into the future and prevent crimes.
  • The dining hall at Texas A&M’s new facility only serves Dippin’ Dots. It’s the dining hall of the future.
  • A&M’s new facilities even include 2 janitorial closets, a larger one for janitorial supplies, mops, & brooms, and a smaller one to serve as their basketball team’s meeting room.
  • This whole video is just gorilla marketing for Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups… Watch the video again if you don’t know what I mean.
  • The only thing this building doesn’t feature is a National Championship trophy case.
  • Kansas and Iowa State are telling all their friends, “We used to play with them in the Big 12. I swear! Texas A&M probably knows me!”
  • Hopefully, some of those touch-screen video boards can help Kevin Sumlin learn his players’ names.
  • This is why college football players never go to class.
  • Still don’t know what “Gig ‘Em” means.
  • The stars at night… Are still not as good as the 4 & 5 stars A&M will now be bringing in.
  • Now, when people ask if you play fantasy football, they’ll really be asking if you play football at Texas A&M.
  • Meanwhile, at Texas

• • •

This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter (which he apparently thought was important enough to share here). He also wears pants everyday.

Austin

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