Spring Breaker Brady Apologizes For Not Letting The Party Die During Coronavirus

You remember Brady, right? He was the face of last week’s spring breakers who went viral in more ways than one.

I’m sad to report that the ‘rona stopped Brady and many other spring breakers from partying. On top of that, many of them came back and immediately tested positive for coronavirus. True story.

Well now, ol’ Brades – who I can only assume is the treasurer of his fraternity – has decided to apologize for his remarks from last week.

View this post on Instagram

I’ve done a lot of things in my life that I’m not proud of. I’ve failed, I’ve let down, and I’ve made plenty of mistakes. I can’t apologize enough to the people i’ve offended and the lives I’ve insulted. I’m not asking for your forgiveness, or pity. I want to use this as motivation to become a better person, a better son, a better friend, and a better citizen. Listen to your communities and do as health officials say. Life is precious. Don’t be arrogant and think you’re invincible like myself. I’ve learned from these trying times and I’ve felt the repercussions to the fullest. Unfortunately, simply apologizing doesn’t justify my behavior. I’m simply owning up to my mistakes and taking full responsibility for my actions. Thank you for your time, and stay safe everyone. ❤️

A post shared by @ bradysluder on Mar 22, 2020 at 10:34am PDT

Not only was his Instagram image a pretty sincere apology, but his caption was too. And this is a guy who’s Instagram page only has two posts: this apology and a throwback pic of him and his bro Jake from freshman year. What an epic year that was. Back when him and Jake were young, free, and not staring as the main doofus in viral videos during global pandemics.

Last week, I broke down the Spring Breakers in that video individually, and this is what I wrote about Brady:

The only thing more predictable about this guy other than his flushed cheeks is the fact that his name is Brady. Of course this kids name Brady. Brady says, “If he gets corona, I get corona,” but what I think he thinks is, “If I get Corona, I get Corona… At the end of the day, I’m more of a Modelo guy, but I can slam a Corona if my bros give me one. Find your beach, amirite?!” Brady just wants a good time. You can tell because his hat is on backwards.

But now that he has apologized, I take it back and actually throw some respect his way, because when someone apologizes, I tend to forgive right away. I’m not one of those people who needs to know the tone of someone’s apology or who judges the strength of an apology. To me, if you’re sorry and you say you’re sorry, then that’s good enough for me. Any grudge that’s held after that is on me. Obviously, there’s exceptions here, but for the most part, that’s the way I feel. Which is kind of funny, considering how much I love Twitter. Because Twitter is the exact opposite. Twitter will not only dissect your apology, they’ll dance and piss on your damn grave. Which I’m sure they’re doing to Brady right now.

Sure, what Brady (and other Spring Breakers) did was stupid, it was selfish, and could potentially – God forbid – be fatal. But unless he’s inexplicably friends with a mad scientist who makes time machines that run on plutonium, the only thing he can do to correct his mistake is to acknowledge it and apologize. I respect that he bucked up. He – whether deservingly so or not – kind of became the splotchy red face of every spring breaker who failed to adhere to social distancing just based on that one CBS News video. I just hope every other spring breaker carries his sentiment.

Props Brady. Here’s hoping we completely get through this and you and your bros can throw one hell of a rager on the other side. Just please don’t do it before then.

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