Right In The Baseballs

On Monday night, Texas Rangers pitcher Dustin Nippert took a ball right off the head. In a sense, last night, Carl Crawford did too.

In the top of the first inning, Carl Crawford had a fairly large lead on first base. Baltimore Orioles pitcher Jake Arrieta made a pick off move towards first and picked off Crawford who appeared to be in some pain. It was made apparent why, until the replay.

Video via: Deadspin.com

Crawford’s twin boys seemed to have been hit by the ball, allowing for the announcer to turn this moment of the game into a PSA, saying: “Ladies and gentlemen, that’s precisely the reason why you should always wear a cup.”

Quick tangent, but why the heck would ladies ever need to wear a cup?

Right when Crawford went down, all Rays fans sighed in unison, “Ahhh, nuts.” After having to play the rest of the game without Carl Crawford, last night’s game for the Rays really appeared to be a test(icle). Now that the Rays have fallen out of first place in the AL East, the target has apparently moved from their back to their crotch. But you gotta hand it to Arrieta, that throw over was pretty ballsy. Most pitchers have a rocket arm, but not Arrieta. He has a crotch rocket arm. He also obviously loves fruit as he was picking berries. That was less of a pick-off attempt, and more of a dick-off attempt. Since no serious damage was done, I think it’s safe to say that Carl Crawford crotch was the real “weiner” of last night’s game. Arrieta hit Carl Crawford in the gonads.

Alright, that last one wasn’t even clever… But let’s face it, getting hit in the balls is funny. Unless of course, it’s you. What else do you think has kept America’s Funniest Home Videos on the air for so long? Because it obviously HASN’T been the hosts.

I can’t help it, but every time I watch this video, I watch it with this kid’s commentary in the background: