Padres Unveil New Uniforms, Same As Old Ones
The San Diego Padres wasted everyone’s time called a press conference today at PETCO Park to unveil their new uniforms and new logos for the 2012 season. Or so we thought…
Sure, there are minor changes to their uniforms, but for the most part, this is what we’ve seen from the Padres since 2004. Then again, we’ve also seen mediocre baseball out of San Diego for nearly that long as well.
Now, you might debate that these new Padres camouflage uniforms are much different than their old camouflage uniforms. And to that I say, “Regardless, they still look horrific, Jeff Foxworthy.” Are the Padres wanting to hit home runs or kill Bambi’s mom?
Sheesh, no wonder Trevor Hoffman left San Diego.
On a serious note, I may be skeptical of those camouflage uniforms, but they really do work. The Padres haven’t been seen in the playoffs since they’ve started wearing them.
It’s like the guy who’s job it was to design new Padres uniforms stayed up late into the night on Tuesday playing the new Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3. He fell asleep while playing and woke up an hour before the meeting in which he was supposed to reveal his design. So he copy and pasted the design from last year’s jerseys, tweaked like one thing on each, threw in a Modern Warfare 3 themed jersey and was out the door catching the 9:30 train into the city.
However, the Padres didn’t just want to waste your time announce the arrival of new jerseys. They also unveiled new Padres logos. Or continuing from the theme above, the exact same Padres logos.
The things I would’ve given to be at the announcement of their “brand new” logos.
Padres: “Ladies and gentlemen, it brings me great pride to introduce to you the new look of your San Diego Padres…”
::unveils logo below::
Crowd: “……..(cough, from the back of the room)…….”
Padres: “Eh? How bout it? Your new look Padres!”
Crowd: “Have you unveiled the new logo yet?
Padres: “Yes… Here. It’s your new look Padres!”
Crowd: “I think your PowerPoint slide is stuck. That’s last year’s logo.”
Padres: “No, no. This is your NEW LOOK Padres!”
Crowd: “Stop saying that. We’re well aware that is the same logo from last year.”
Padres: “What’s that? You want to see the NEXT logo of your new look Padres?!”
Crowd: “Yes. And we’d like to see the first one as well.”
Padres: “Your wish is my command. Here is the NEXT logo of your new look Padres…”
::unveils logo below::
Crowd: “We’re leaving.”
• • •
This post was written by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff
And also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats
Just like Boise State’s blue uniforms have been banned, I think the Padre’s camo shirts should be as well – the batter won’t be able to see where the fielders are!