Memo To ESPN: Here’s A List of Songs That Are Better Stadium Anthems Than ‘Old Town Road’
Hopefully you enjoyed your weekend. Hopefully you weren’t on the Internet or by your phone very much. Because hopefully you missed this tweet from ESPN.
Anything AC/DC? Great. Jump Around? Of course (shout out Camp Randall Stadium). Swag Surfin’? I’ll allow it, for sure. The Final Countdown? Ok. Seven Nation Army? This is the correct answer, so definitely, and wait a minute… Old Town Road?!
Has the person who runs this account ever been to a stadium before?
Old Town Road is 15 months old. And for 5 of those months, every stadium in the country has been closed. How in the hell is this among the six best stadium anthems of all time? Did Billy Ray Cyrus make this list?
Now look, I’m not here to hate on Old Town Road. Sure, people are probably tired of this song, probably because it went diamond and sold over ten million units. It got more radio play than Geico commercials. But let he/she who hasn’t bobbed his/her head to this jam at least once cast the first stone. But despite all that, it’s not a “stadium anthem.”
And ESPN should know this considering they produced 5 of the greatest stadium anthem CD’s of all time… Jock Jams Volume 1, Jock Jams Volume 2, Jock Jams Volume 3, Jock Jams Volume 4, and Jock Jams Volume 5. But somewhere since the release of those iconic albums, they lost touch with what a stadium anthem is or isn’t. So to help out ESPN, we put together a list of songs that are more popular stadium anthems than Old Town Road.
Cotton Eyed Joe by Rednex
Since the mid-90s you can’t enter and exit a stadium without hearing this song at least once. I’m not sure what the draw to this song is – blame white people – but whenever it comes on, people jump and dance. Like it or not, you can’t deny it’s a stadium anthem.
The Theme To Frasier
Sure, this may not be atop everyone’s stadium anthem list, but it definitely should be higher than Old Town Road. Plus, I’m not positive on this – and don’t look it up – but I’m pretty sure they sing this during the 7th inning stretch of Mariners games.
Funky Cold Medina by Tone Loc
When picking songs from Tone Loc’s catalog, it’s hard to decide which one to choose. But I usually go with Funky Cold Medina. Mainly because it’s funky, it’s cold, and it’s Medina. Now is this the greatest stadium anthem of all time? Not even close. But is it more of a stadium anthem than Lil’ Nas X? You know what I’m sayin’.
Hide And Seek by Imogen Heap
Many people know this from the insane season finale of the iconic TV masterpiece The O.C. Some may know it from the spoof of said finale from SNL. And yeah, it’s kind of a downer tune, but at least it’s not Old Town Road.
Mad World by Gary Jules
Sure this is somewhat of a sad song that can get you all up in your feelings. And maybe it reminds you more of the cult classic film Donnie Darko than a massive turnover deep in your opponent’s territory. But it’s still a better stadium anthem than Lil Nas X and Billy Ray.
The Background Music To Cruisin’ USA
The weathered, jazzy, and yet still sensual vocal tones of that guy saying “Cruisin’, yeah, yeah” and then quickly following up with a short “Cruisin’ USA” really sets the tone for this entire game. Again, I doubt this song has ever been played at a stadium of any of the four major professional sports in America (maybe it’s been played at an MLS game? I’ve never been to one), but it’s still more of a stadium anthem than Old Town Road.
[divider][/divider]
Hope this helps, ESPN. Let’s never make this mistake again.
