Tuesday, July 23, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog


Today Matt Jones, a wide receiver for the Jacksonville Jaguars who was drafted in the first round out of Arkansas in 2005, was released today. Jones was jailed for five days after testing positive for alcohol as part of the diversion program that allowed him to avoid felony cocaine possession charges. Jones failed a drug and alcohol screening and after told a judge that he drank beer while golfing with some buddies.
Smart move Matt. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. The Jaguars wanted nothing more to do with him.

Smart move Jacksonville. The Jaguars had previously released Jerry Porter and opted not to re-sign Reggie Williams. Who are they thinking will play reciever next year? Vince Papale?

We’re getting off topic. I’m not here to dawg on the Jags. All I want to say is:

Really, Matt Jones?!

Let’s go ahead and have some fun with this situation.

  • How bad of a golf game did you shoot?
  • Matt will always have a future in Hollywood if they ever make a sequel to Requiem for a Dream.
  • We all knew that Matt Jones had speed. However, I bet now that takes on more than one meaning.
  • Matt, now that you are out of football, Michael Phelps wants to know if you want to hang out?
  • Matt, now that you are out of football, Pacman Jones wants to know if you want to hang out?
  • Matt is now looking into his second love, basketball… mainly just to shoot around before games.
  • I guess Matt thought it would be ok to Drink and Drive (and putt).
  • Matt really wasted a good opportunity.
  • Remember that scene from Any Given Sunday – Directors Cut when they are doing cocaine in the bathroom of that banquet? Matt Jones was an extra in that scene.
  • I wonder what his method will be from here on out?
  • And to think, he was just about to crack into the elite group of wideouts
  • At least this will give him a good (free) base to start over with
  • Sorry Mateo but this blows…
  • Matt, just take the Ricky Williams path to success. Retire, regret it, play in the CFL, then everntually hope someone will pick you back up.
  • Just try and keep your nose outta trouble Matt!
  • I think Matt was only in it to get that Coke endorsement.
  • The Jaguars cut Matt. Then Matt cut some cocaine.
  • Odds of Matt Jones getting back into the league soon? I say it’s a push (off).
  • Heck, at least he didn’t do steroids!

It’s hard to believe that such a clean cut guy would be into drugs.

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