Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Let Me Be Frank With You…

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This is when you KNOW you’re bad.

That man you see with the confident, smug look on his face is Donald Sterling, owner of the Los Angeles Clippers. Apparently he’s put up with the Clippers being horrible for far too long and has begun taunting his own players, specifically Baron Davis. According to Yahoo! Sports, Sterling has been heard by many sources screaming the following “insults” at Davis:

“Why are you in the game?”

“Why did you take that shot?”

“You’re out of shape!”

Talk about a lack of creativity. Those sound like canned lines shouted from a staged crowd in a Disney sitcom. Furthering his streak of increativity (don’t think that’s a word), Sterling simply had this to say about his heckling, “When they make shots, it’s great. When they don’t, we’re all disappointed.”

No wonder the Clippers suck.

Cool new logo Big Ten…not.

In case you haven’t seen the news, that childish/girly looking logo you see there wasn’t created by my 13 year old nephew in Microsoft Paint. It is the new Big Ten logo now that they have added a twelfth team. A few things strike me as odd about this.

1. Seriously, who chose that color? Is that Robin’s Egg Blue?

2. Wasn’t the point of a new logo to take out the hidden “11” of the previous one and replace it with a “12”? All I see is a random “1”. (And I will admit to spending far too long staring at that ugly thing looking for a “2”. I promise you it’s not there).

3. Why is the work “Ten” inside a blue bar? Maybe I’m being picky on this one but it kind of throws the whole horizontal line of symmetry off and just doesn’t look good.

In addition to this horrible new logo, the Big Ten also has embarrassed its member institutions by renaming its two divisions “Legends” and “Leaders”. I think we should just call the whole board who made these changes “Epic” and “Fail”.

Robots will one day take over sports.

Obviously answering trivia questions isn’t a sport (right?), but if a machine can become a contestant on the game show Jeopardy!, then they will probably start playing sports as well. I was certain Peyton Manning was a machine until here recently when he started throwing interceptions and showing his human side. Maybe he just has a virus. He shouldn’t have let his 3 month trial version of Norton Anti-Virus expire.

Watson, a computer/machine/robot/thing created by IBM is scheduled to appear on Jeopardy! in mid-February against Jeopardy! legends Ken Jennings and Brad Rutter. Interestingly, although Watson isn’t even a human, he has spent time with more ladies than Ken and Brad combined.

This just in: Bill Belichick does indeed have some semblance of a personality.

The only reason I’m posting this video is because I have given Bill Belichick plenty of grief in the past for having ZERO personality and about as many human traits as that Watson character mentioned above. He actually playfully joked around with Chad Ochocinco and it was caught on film! Amazing stuff.

What’s the deal with T.I.’s wife?

I know this isn’t breaking news or anything, but I was just recently introduced to the fact that T.I.’s wife is one of the more hideous things I’ve ever laid my eyes upon. This may be common knowledge, but I’m not exactly what you would call “hip” to the whole hip-hop culture scene. Maybe she’s beautiful on the inside, but can you not do better than that T.I.? Google her, people. She’s truly awful.

As always, if you have any ideas for future posts or just come across something funny, please shoot me an email at Frank@KorkedBats.com.

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