Let Me Be Frank With You…

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This girl looks like a man.

Or is it this man looks like a girl? Dadgummit, why are there people like this? Meet Kye Allums, women’s basketball’s first ever transgender player (that we have medically confirmed). What a proud moment for the Allums family. In a league full of manly-women, their daughter/son/living creature could be considered the manliest of them all. Sweet! Referred to as a “male member of George Washington’s women’s basketball team” on the school’s website, Kye, or lets just call her Kyle (if she can transgenderize her actual self, why can’t we at least transgenderie her name that isn’t even a real name?), wants to be identified as a man this season.

“GW has been supportive during this transition. This means a lot. I didn’t choose to be born in this body and feel the way I do. I decided to transition — that is, change my name and pronouns — because it bothered me to hide who I am, and I am trying to help myself and others to be who they are,” Allums said in a statement posted Tuesday on the school website.

I will also add Allums was honored as the 2008 Minnesota Miss Basketball. If she wants to be a man, treat her, crap, I mean him (gotta watch those pronouns!), like a man and disqualify her him from the women’s basketball team.

Nevermind, they’ve been letting men play that sport for years.

This is a better man than me.

His name is Edison Pena and he was one of 33 Chilean miners trapped a half-mile underground for 69 days. This weekend he plans on running in the New York City Marathon. Great, while I’m laying on the couch in whatever clothes I wore the night before, hungover, watching football, finalizing the roster of my 3-5 fantasy football team, and trying to decide whether I want Wendy’s or Taco Bell for lunch, this guy will be running 26.2 miles, roughly the amount of miles I’ve run since the age of 15. He’s awesome. I’m not.

I really like these videos.

This guy has come out with a few of these music videos and they’ve all been great. This one might be the best. First, because Randy Moss is quite entertaining and ridiculous and I like him. And second, I think it might actually be a catchy song.

On a side note, one has to wonder what led to such an abrupt trainwreck of a relationship between Moss and the Vikings. He probably got tired of his quarterback getting his number mixed up with Jenn Sterger’s and getting woken up in the middle of the night to pictures of a 41 year old penis.

If you like random things, you’ll like this

I don’t really know the background story on this as the video doesn’t really give any information. And lord knows I don’t watch Jimmy Kimmel Live! But I did stumble upon this gem of a YouTube clip the other day which features Will Ferrell and Manny Pacquiao singing “Imagine” by the Beatles. I have no further comments because I don’t even know where to begin. Enjoy.

Local car dealership commercials need to stop using the owner’s kids.

Sorry about that picture. That kid is gross, but I didn’t know what else to put up. But my point is, why does it seem that 80% of all local family owned business commercials feature the owner’s usually unfathomably annoying kid(s)? Nobody wants to see little Jimmy try and be cute. He’s not cute. You just think he’s cute because you produced him. There’s no possible way you could think that shoving your kid(s) in our face every time a dreaded commercial break comes on will help you sell more cars, or diamond rings, or lawn mowers, or whatever it is you intend on selling me.

Bonus Topic: John Wall was a steal away from a triple-double last night, set the NBA record for most assists in the first three games of a career, and beat the 76ers. But that wasn’t the most impressive thing he did last night. This was.

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As always, if you have any ideas for future posts or just come across something funny, please shoot me an email at Frank@KorkedBats.com.

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