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Saturday, April 20, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Kevin and Kyle Continue: Week Se7en

So it’s Week 7, and we are in the middle of bye weeks, which explains why Kevin and I took the week off last week to check out our alma mater back in Missouri. We’re back for week seven, though, and here are our picks, with my commentary this time.

Kevin’s Pick: Atlanta Falcons 27  • Detroit Lions 23

Kyle’s Pick: Falcons 24 – Lions 31

Megatron gets back on track after a lowly 100+ yards and no touchdowns, and the Lions take care of a struggling Falcons squad.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Chicago Bears 17 • Tampa Bay 21

Kyle’s Pick: Bears 20 – Bucs 30

I’m just not sold on the Bears being an above average team as long as Devin Hester doesn’t run back a kickoff.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Seattle Seahawks 20 • Cleveland Browns 24

Kyle’s Pick: Seahawks 17 – Browns 10

A team will miss Peyton Hillis, which in itself is a sad statement.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Denver Broncos 17 • Miami Dolphins 13

Kyle’s Pick: Broncos 24 – Dolphins 21

And then Tim Tebow will get Yankees-like press coverage and we will all regret our decision to care.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Houston Texans 23 • Tennessee Titans 30

Kyle’s Pick: Texans 20 – Titans 27

This division is worse than any other in football, and the Texans are without the best player on their team in Andre Johnson. Viewers will lose.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: San Diego Chargers 24 • New York Jets 27

Kyle’s Pick: Chargers 31 – Jets 27

I think Norv Turner took offense to Rex Ryan’s comments, and although they were probably true, the Chargers will win this game.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Washington Redskins 14 • Carolina Panthers 28

Kyle’s Pick: Redskins 11 – Panthers 24

It took seven weeks for Cam Newton to play in a game where he was the best overall player on either team, though teams playing the Redskins often find themselves in that position.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Kansas City Chiefs 16 • Oakland Raiders 20

Kyle’s Pick: Chiefs 22 – Raiders 20

I just don’t want my team to lose to Kyle Boller. Please.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Pittsburgh Steelers 34 • Arizona Cardinals 20

Kyle’s Pick: Steelers 34 – Cardinals 14

Poor, poor Larry Fitzgerald, getting Seattle’d (forgotten) down in the desert.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: St. Louis Rams 21 • Dallas Cowboys 31

Kyle’s Pick: Rams 13 – Cowboys 28

The Boys get back on track and continue the Rams’ conquest for the first overall pick in the draft, so they can hopefully trade it for a million other picks.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Green Bay Packers 38 • Minnesota Vikings 24

Kyle’s Pick: Packers 45 – Vikings 20

Aaron Rodgers will have his normal, modest statistics, accumulating them in about 14 minutes of game time.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Indianapolis Colts 10 • New Orleans Saints 28

Kyle’s Pick: Colts probably some – Saints a lot more

The ever-engaging Curtis Painter v. Drew Brees matchup leans heavily on the player who is actually a great quarterback.

• • •

Kevin’s Pick: Baltimore Ravens 31 • Jacksonville Jaguars 13

Kyle’s Pick: Ravens 34 – Jaguars

Blaine Gabbert will probably take a medical redshirt back to Mizzou after this game.

Overall Record: Kevin 40-21; Kyle 33-27

Kyle

Kyle is a comedian writer, actor, and producer. You may have seen his standup on CONAN, or somewhere else if you’re really into standup. He has appeared on Fuse, Comedy Central, VH1, and more, and he has written for CBS, Comedy Central, TBS, contributed to Roasts, as well as Huffington Post, CNN, The New York Times, Wired, and a really cool site called Korked Bats.

Kyle

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