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Friday, March 29, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Kenny Hill Nicknames

NCAA Football: Texas A&M at South Carolina

Last night, during the Texas A&M Aggies’ manhandling of the South Carolina Gamecocks, everyone and their mother tried to give Aggies quarterback Kenny Hill the nickname “Kenny Football,” which is weird, because most moms don’t even watch college football. However, after the game, Kenny Hill admitted that he doesn’t really like the new nickname. So we decided to come up with some better alternatives for him.

  • Kenny Football
    • He admitted he doesn’t like this nickname. We need a new one.
  • Kenneth Pigskin
    • It’s a tad more mature than Kenny Football.
  • Mr. Gamecock
    • Because last night, he became South Carolina’s daddy.
  • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater
  • First And Ken
    • Because he’s always moving those sticks.
  • KHill
    • This nickname is… actually, you know what? Scratch this one. It sounds too much like kill. And this sport doesn’t need another Aaron Hernandez. لعبة 21
  • Ken Giggy Jr.
    • He’s young. He’s a phenom. And he’s the second of his kind (Junior to Johnny Manziel).
  • Kenny Fried Chicken
    • Because he torches opposing defenses until they’re extra crispy.
  • Kenny Football
  • Kenny Powers
    • If he’s anything like Texas A&M’s last quarterback, he drinks… A LOT! (h/t: @Mr_Krunkle)
  • It’s Raining Ken
    • Hallelujah, it’s raining Ken!
  • King of the Hill
    • Get it? Because his last name is Hill. That’s all I have for this one.
  • Kenny The Jett
    • When he gets to the NFL, he’ll sign an endorsement deal with P.F. Flyers.
  • The Curious Case of Kenjamin Cuttin’
    • His performance last night was Oscar-worthy.
  • The Snowflake from Southlake
    • He went to Southlake Carroll High School just outside of Dallas, TX… And he’s ice cold.
  • Kenny Heisman
    • This is like Joey Harrington’s “Joey Heisman” nickname. So, let’s only go with this one if he DOESNT actually want to win the Heisman Trophy.
  • Kenny Football
    • Stop trying to make Kenny Football happen. IT’S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!
  • Johnny Manziel’s Replacement
    • This is probably what everyone in the country already knows him as.
  • Johnny Manziel’s Designated Driver
    • This is probably what everyone in College Station already knows him as.
  • Kentucky and Runny
    • Because he’s a scrambling quarterback… Ken tucks and runs… eh? No? Alright.
  • Sumlinsanity
    • He’s like Linsanity, only a product of Kevin Sumlin.
  • Kenmeister
    • This is a nickname your “trying to stay hip” dad will LOVE!
  • Kenny “Da Bomb” Hill
    • Another nickname your “trying to stay hip” dad will LOVE!
  • Kenny Football
    • Fine. Do whatever you want. There’s no se trying to fight it.

• • •

This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin

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