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Tuesday, April 16, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

It’s A.J. Brown Hate Week

Mike Vrabel had literally everyone within St. Thomas SportsPark last week spitting out the same rhythmic dribble, “This isn’t a revenge game. This isn’t a revenge game. This isn’t a rev–” (In hindsight, it probably should have been a revenge game, but that’s another argument for another day.) The assumption to this masterplan game of 4-D Chess Vrabes is always playing is probably because…

This week is the revenge game.

Revenge on Arthur Juan Brown. The Titans

Why do you hate AJ Brown? Wasn’t he TRADED? Shouldn’t you hate your GM for that move? Well… it’s a tad more complicated than that. Titans tried to negotiate with AJ, he refused to even show up to negotiations, blah blah blah. Really the only thing we can be mad at our GM for is getting absolutely fleeced in the deal. Giving up one of the top receivers in the sport for

Now, if you ask AJ about it, he’ll tell you something totally different.

“You know, it’s a business, and I’m not upset about the trade or anything because it is a business or whatever,” Brown told NFL Network Insider Tom Pelissero. “But to be honest, I just didn’t appreciate how it all went down, and they just kind of blamed me for it. I’m man enough to say that, however people may take it.

Pretty sure this is the reason why “gaslighting” was Merriam-Webster’s word of the year. Because how can you take him for his word, when his literal next sentence was…

But I have no bad blood with Tennessee. I’m moving forward. I’m happy to be here. But (there are) a lot of things people don’t know about, and they’re just pointing fingers at me. But that’s OK.”

If the way AJ’s carried himself this year is him having “no bad blood,” than hell hath no fury than AJ Brown when having bad blood.

From subtweeting the franchise from his couch during Sunday Night Football

To going on podcasts to trash the culture inside the Titans building.

To not knowing the history of the franchise before thrusting himself into it.

I dunno, man. Sure seems to me like that bad blood is there. If AJ was Tay Tay, we’d have an entire damn album written about us.

And the irony is that this is a franchise that held his hands through some extremely dark and vulnerable times in his young life and professional career. And then he whips right around and flips double birds on his way to the Birds. Yeah, that’s where this whole thing soured for me. Personally, I was a massive AJ fan. Hell, shortly after this site’s relaunch, he was the subject of one of our first videos.

But since he’s bounced outta town, he’s been nothing more than a dick. And I don’t appreciate dicks. I’m anti-dicks. Dicks suck. And so it’s for that reason…

I wish all the best to AJ mentally and personally, but on a football field, I hope he stubs his toe on every route.

I know Philly fan is going to be all, “Why don’t you cry about it, loser! WAWA!” And then you’ll start to rebuttal, but then they’ll say, “You didn’t let me finish! WAWA is the best convenience store in the country!” But look, this isn’t about you, Philly fan. This is strictly personal. And you, of all fanbases, should agree – and hell, probably respect – our disdain for this one man. This is us against him. Personally, I have no beef with Philly (no cheesesteak pun intended). My mom grew up there. My uncle played ball at Nova. This is a big Kyle Gibson blog. I still have a soft spot for M. Night Shyamalan. Again, we don’t have any problem with our ex’s new guy. We’re just pissed off at our ex.

Hell, I’ll even wish you the best of luck this season. Not that you need it. Philly is dominating. In all sports! The way this year has gone, the Birds will probably make it to the Super Bowl! Again, with the way this year has gone, they’ll probably lose (sorry Phillies and Union), but at least they’ll make it!

The Titans could get rocked this week, who knows?! But even if they do and AJ Brown only has like 1 catch for 6 yards and a fumble, we’ll still be like, “Ok, not a bad day overall. Let’s go eat some hot chicken and talk about country music!”

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin