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Friday, March 29, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Happy Birthday, Michael Keaton! America’s Instagram Dad

When we started The CineBoiz Podcast back in February, one of the things I took upon myself as co-host was to start following as many actors, directors, entertainment-news profiles as possible on social media. It’s important to keep your finger on the pulse of the entertainment world if you want to be anything in this racket.

Most of these celebrities’ profiles aren’t anything special. They’re largely just pictures of them on set or behind the scenes. Some highlight that their lives are just as mundane as ours when they’re not working or at home. Others use their platform to highlight the grandness of their status in society. Typically stuff I scroll past just so I can see how many likes/comments @thecineboiz is getting in an effort to boost my fragile ego. Through all of the social-media sites however, I must say that no celebrity’s profile or handle has captured my attention more than Michael Keaton’s Instagram. In honor of his 69th birthday (nice), I’d like to share some of my favorites and make my case as to why we as a society should officially crown him America’s Instagram Dad.

(Head’s up: some of these posts highlight Mr. Keaton’s personal politics and this post is in no way endorsing or condemning anyone’s political views or leanings. It’s simply to highlight how he executes posting content.)

Exhibit A: Photo of American Flag on Porch; Montana Landscape Backdrop; unrelated caption.

This photo could be made the standard desktop background for every American dad and absolutely none of them would bother changing it. I’m not a dad, and I’m getting emotional just looking at it. Where this post truly shines though is in it’s caption, “Read my friend Mike Barnicle’s piece in the Daily Beast please.” No links, no tags, no context for what the article is about. Just a directive for you to go read an article. Solid Dad-Flex, Beetlejuice.

Exhibit B: Dog in Snow; Four Wheeler Tracks; dad-joke about social distancing in caption.

There’s perhaps no greater relationship than a dad and his dog. Here Daddy-Keats sneaks in some more landscape (this time it’s Montana in the snow) and includes his dog in the photo. Again, the caption is where he hits the home-run. It’s timely and straight-up dad. “Doing his best to socially distance.” Fantastico, Batman. *chef’s kiss*

Exhibit C: Multiple Posts; iPhone Camera Photos of TV and Newspapers used as Screen Shots.

First, a video of his TV while he watched Bridesmaids. Keeping his dad-game strong.

Next, a picture of his desktop screen to share an article he was reading at the time. Pro-Tip, it is ABSOLUTELY un-Dad to hit that share button…take an iPhone pic, scrubs.

Next is what we call a straight-up DAD POWER MOVE. A photo of the newspaper article he was reading. As long as we have Dads, print is not dead.

Finally, bringing out the big-guns… an iPhone video, taken by Keats of Kimberly Guilfoyle at the RNC. Caption: “She might be Cray Cray”.

24k Dad-Gold.

If the evidence pleases the court, I rest my case. Happy Birthday to Michael Keaton: Bat-Dad of Instagram.

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Kenny

Kenny lives in Austin, TX and is one of the co-hosts of the CineBoiz Podcast. When he isn’t talking about or watching movies he can be found kicking it with Mickie the Dog and re-watching the Kansas City Chiefs win Super Bowl 54 for the 25th time.

Kenny

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