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Thursday, March 28, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Ghostbusters: Afterlife Theory: This Will Be The Return of Rick Moranis

If you’re like me, you grew up on Ghostbusters.

I had a proton pack, a ghost trap, the massive firehouse toy set, the Ecto 1 with a pop-out gunner seat. I ate a lot of marshmallows. Whenever someone would ask me who I was going to call, I always answered “Ghostbusters!” I wasn’t afraid of no ghosts. Some people are fortunate to have been raised by one father. I was fortunate to have been raised by five: Egon, Venkman, Winston, Ray, and well, my actual dad. I watched Ghostbusters. I watched Ghostbusters II. I watched the Ghostbusters cartoon. At a young age I couldn’t understand why Slimer was bad in the movies, but good in the cartoon. I’m telling you, I was a Ghostbusters junkie.

So obviously, I was excited when this new trailer dropped.

This movie could suck, and with the extended track record of reboots and sequels, you’d be safe to bet that it will. But after watching this trailer, I’m stoked.

When I saw the Ecto 1 drive through that field, a chill drove through my spine. When the sound of that old Ecto 1 siren hit my eardrums, I immediately went to Fandango to see if I could preorder tickets yet (I can’t).

This is how reboots should be done. Instead of repurposing the same jokes and characters from the original film, reboots should create new jokes and characters that merely exist in the same universe. Essentially breathing new life into old stories.

After reading an interview Reitman did with Vanity Fair last week, it appears that’s exactly what this movie is going to do. He said Afterlife “is a new adventure that connects back to” the events of the original movies.

In a word: yes. In two words: hell yes.

After watching the trailer, I have a theory (or at very least, a suggestion). The biggest question from the trailer is how does this family fit into the original story? The easy connection here is they’re the grandchildren of Egon Spengler. For one, they look exactly like him. On top of that, when Paul Rudd’s character asks “Who are you?” the kid is literally touching the Spengler onesie uniform. But that’s exactly what they WANT you to think.

Forgive me, but I’m not a sheep. I like to make opinions for myself.

I like to believe those kids are the grandchildren of Louis Tully, aka Rick Moranis. I’m hoping this movie is going to serve as the long awaited acting return of everyone’s favorite Little Giant. This is the movie Wayne Szalinsky, Barney Rubble, and Lord Dark Helmet makes his return from retirement. Sadly, Rick hasn’t acted since 1997 to become a full-time father, six years after his wife passed away. Wouldn’t this be the perfect movie for him to step back into the spotlight?

In a word: yes. In two words: hell yes.

Not to mention, this idea of Louis Tully returning plays into the trailer. Think about it. The only thing this family is left with is that farm in the middle of nowhere. Farms with a lot of land aren’t cheap. Who would have the means to afford something like that? An accountant. Louis Tully was the Ghostbusters’ accountant.

Plus, the irony of the daughter of an accountant going completely broke is the perfect setup for this movie.

We all know how obsessed Louis was with the gear the Ghostbusters used. The hidden shack on that farm from the trailer was full of the old Ghostbusters gear.

You’re probably like, well, if the family from the trailer is Louis Tully’s, why did the mom have blonde hair? I’m glad you hypothetically asked. Remember the blonde from Louis’s party from the original Ghostbusters?

Now, what about that quick shot of the leg slamming on the hood of the car Paul Rudd was driving? That leg looked a lot like the leg of a Terror Dog from the original film. The most famous and powerful Terror Dogs were the two servants of Gozer, with one of which being Vinz Clortho, the Keymaster, who possessed… you guessed it… Louis Tully.

Remember how the kid was touching the Spengler jumpsuit during the Paul Rudd voiceover asking, “Who are you?” Well, remember what jumpsuit Louis Tully wore in the original?

Really makes ya think.

Moranis turned down a cameo role in the 2016 reboot of Ghostbusters, and explained why in an exclusive interview with The Hollywood Reporter, saying “I’m interested in anything that I would find interesting. I still get the occasional query about a film or television role and as soon as one comes along that piques my interest, I’ll probably do it. [But Ghostbusters] didn’t appeal to me.”

He also added:

“It’s hard to come up with original material,” he says. “Occasionally, they get it right or else they wouldn’t attempt to do these things. I’m surprised that Disney hasn’t done Honey, I Shrunk the Grandkids. But I’m happy with the things I said yes to, and I’m very happy with the many things I’ve said no to. Yes, I am picky, and I’ll continue to be picky. Picky has worked for me.”

It’s a good thing he was picky about that cameo, because that reboot was really bad. It was silly, very CGI heavy, and did not have strong ties to the original. Oh, and did you know the entire main cast was female? I feel like no one really talked about that.

If the makers of Afterlife somehow are able to pull off what no one since 1997 has been able to accomplish, pulling Rick Moranis back onto the silverscreen, then there’s no doubt in my mind this movie will become an instant classic, just as its predecessors did. Try and name a film with Rick Moranis that didn’t become a cultural phenomenon. I’ll wait. And don’t say Big Bully, because that was more on Tom Arnold than anyone. Oh, and don’t say Honey We Shrunk Ourselves either. That movie went straight to video and had none of the original cast except Rick. You really expect Moranis to carry the entire franchise on his back?

All I’m saying is if the filmmakers behind Afterlife are looking to unlock a hit, they need to turn to The Keymaster.

Ghostbusters: Afterlife comes out July 10, 2020. And remember, don’t cross the streams.

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin

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