Gameday Grub Of The Week: Falcon Stew
As we begin to see frosted grass, chilled plumes of breath, and increasingly competitive football, nothing quite hits the spot on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon than a warm bowl of hearty chili or a dozen hot buffalo wings. These, among other traditional gameday grub such as loaded nachos, are classics that have withstood the test of time and given fans comfort during undoubtedly stressful times.
However, if you’re tired of the same old sporting spread this autumn and winter, Korked Bats has you covered. Starting this week and each week moving forward, we’ll bring you a new recipe that could give your food game a fresh kick.
Falcon Stew
This one can be a bit of a challenge, mostly due to the difficulty of procuring the right ingredients. But if you’re diligent, you’ll be handsomely rewarded.
For this recipe, much like many other stews, you’ll need the following:
Specific equipment/materials:
- Large stock pot
- Falcon’s fan
- Mean friends
Ingredients:
- 1 pound falcon meat, cubed (can use chicken, if falcon is unavailable)
- 1 cup Atlanta Falcons fan tears
- 2 carrots, diced
- 2 stalks of celery, diced
- 1 yellow onion, diced
- 1 ½ cups potatoes, peeled and diced
- 1 tsp. rosemary
- 1 tsp. thyme
- 1 tsp. sage
- Salt and pepper to taste
- 3 cups falcon broth
Directions:
- Throw your aromatics—carrot, celery, onion—in a large stock pot until somewhat tender. In the meantime, berate a Falcon’s fan for being an idiot and a loser that will never experience the glory of winning a Super Bowl, then collect the ensuing tears.
- Add all seasonings and potatoes until the potatoes become a bit soft.
- Toss in your diced falcon and cook until the meat is almost cooked through. (So easy so far, right?! You’ll feel like you’re up 28–3 in the second half of this recipe.)
- Add your falcon broth and Falcon’s fan tears and bring to a simmer. Allow the stew to simmer until Julio Jones leaves the game after reaggravating one of many injuries.
- Serve piping hot to all your guests, except the Falcon’s fan. If the Falcon’s fan is wearing one of the team’s new god-awful jerseys, fling the remaining soup on the jersey. Tip: Flinging an especially hot stew onto the fan could allow more tears to be collected for the next time you make this.
Whether you’re looking to simply satisfy your weekend guests or impress your friends with something not-so-traditional, this stew is sure to never disappoint, despite its namesake. If you’re a Falcons fan, be a good sport, accept your team’s fate, and take part in preparing a delicious gameday meal for all.
Good grubbin’, KB Army!
