Football or Fútbol?

Ladies, this might be the time in football that you are realizing that your team isn’t going to beat LSU and Arkansas and Western Kentucky are the only hope that we have left. This might be the time in football that we start trying to figure out how they are going to figure out who plays in the Tostitos Bowl or who is going to play in the Sunshine Bowl. Or there might… Listen. None of this matters. None of this matters, because I have found the cure to all of our football lows. New football. Fútbol.

Meet my favorite soccer player and soon to be yours.

No, this isn’t Mowgli from the real-life version of The Jungle Book.

No, this isn’t Uncle Jesse’s younger cousin from out of town that only comes to visit during sweeps.

No, this isn’t young Fonzi and No, he has not married a former Spice Girl… yet.

But he is busy shooting the new 007 movie where he will play Pierce Brosnan and he is busy working on his British accent.

He is one of those soccer players that America needs to get on our side. Like David Beckham and all of those other ones… Alright. Let’s be real. Nobody know any of the other ones.

Yohann Gourcuff.

This name and this face will be able to wake up the ladies from the football slump. Yohann Gourcuff can and will.