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Dodgers Complete Historic 30-Team, 725 Player Trade In Pursuit Of First Title Since 1988

LOS ANGELES — Just when you thought the Los Angeles Dodgers run of 7-straight NL West titles followed by 7-straight demoralizing playoff losses was over, they complete one of the biggest trades in MLB history.

Multiple sources confirm the Dodgers have somehow worked out a deal that involves every MLB team. The Dodgers will receive literally every player from every team’s 25-man roster and will only give up starter Ross Stripling and shortstop prospect Guillermo Dominic, who sources say no one has heard of but they all assume he’s good because he’s in the Dodgers farm system.

The other 29 MLB teams will take turns sharing Dominic, and per sources they have all agreed to just give Stripling to the Orioles.

With a move of this magnitude, all eyes turn to the Dodgers for what seems like the 10th offseason in a row. Dodgers President of Baseball Operations Andrew Freidman feels confident in the package they received from the other teams.

“I think we can really do some damage with the guys we’ve acquired today,” Friedman said. “You’ve got guys like Mike Trout, Bryce Harper, and Mookie Betts?? Plus, the amount of depth we obtained is going to be big for us too.”

Another question this blockbuster deal poses is how it affects the Dodgers’ odds to win the World Series. According to Bovada, with no one on any of the other 29 teams’ rosters, the Dodgers odds have increased from 8/1 to 7/1 just behind the Yankees (3/1), Astros (4/1) and Astros without their trash cans (6/1).

If the Dodgers are able to pull off winning the World Series, it will be their first title since 1988. Lol, I know, right? Crazy. The Dodgers front office feels confident in their plan to obtain literally every player in baseball to accomplish that goal.

“If you can’t beat ’em, have them join you,” Friedman said. “That’s the saying isn’t it?”

Of course, it should be noted that this trade is only contingent on all 750 players passing physicals, which should be completed some time in the next seven months or so.

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter (which he apparently thought was important enough to share here). He also wears pants everyday.

Austin

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