Disney Did A Good Job Of Confirming My Decision To Not Pay For ESPN+
Disney held its annual Investor Day presentation today and made a bunch of major announcements, like over 100 new movies and shows connected to franchises like Star Wars, Marvel, FX and National Geographic. Oh, and a price hike for Disney+ too. But they were very coy about that one. In fact, if you were only half-listening and/or drooling over the fact that Zac Efron is starring in a 3 Men And A Baby reboot, then you probably missed it.
But for sports fans, the important news was what Disney is doing with ESPN. And unfortunately, it appears to be more on the ESPN+ platform. *Sigh* Can we not, Disney? I’m already taking out a second mortgage on my home to save up to hopefully take my kids (who aren’t even born yet) to one of your parks. In 2034. Do you really need my $5.99 a month to watch a Lipscomb Bisons-Murray State basketball game?
The reason ESPN+ sucks so much (and has struggled to take off) is because if you get something for free for years, you’ll be hard-pressed to find people who will pay for it. Check SiriusXM. The average number of regular radio listeners remains so much higher than satellite radio listeners. ESPN has been providing sports on their TV networks for free (well, aside from the jacked up price on my cable bill) for years, and now they’re offering a premium model? And on top of that, a premium model that doesn’t offer anything enticing aside from select MMA fights and soccer matches?
The only time people should pay for something is when they never have gotten it for free. Like the reason Bob Kraft hits up massage parlors. You think any woman wants to touch that leather-faced, mini-Tony Bennett looking ass for free?
But look, if you’re like me – cheap as hell – and you’re looking for reasons NOT to subscribe to ESPN+, don’t worry, Disney did that for you today. Let’s run down their TOP selling points for the future of ESPN+.
This is a strong first punch, I’ll admit it. Having the rights to SEC football is like holding a Wild Draw 4 in hand during UNO. It’s powerful, and you know that nothing can trump that card. Once the current SEC on CBS deal ends, the conference’s game of the week will make the jump to ABC. But since this is Disney, and they’re gluttons for money, they’re going to continue to shove ESPN+ down our throats. Meaning, select SEC games will be featured on the paid service.
However, if you read the fine print, the SEC will only be airing select non-conference games on ESPN+. And as we know, the SEC has some of the weakest non-con games of any conference in college football. You mean to tell me I won’t get to see Alabama play The Citadel? Bummer. No, Florida vs. Eastern Georgia? Say it isn’t so! So I have to subscribe to ESPN+ to watch LSU play South Central Louisiana State University? Take my money!
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Beginning in January, a new daily morning program on ESPN+ will recap the previous night’s sports action and go deep on news, highlights, and trending topics.
— Disney (@Disney) December 10, 2020
Oh, so you mean like SportsCenter?
Cool. Can’t wait to drop $5.99 per month for this exclusive new show!
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In January, ESPN+ is launching an exclusive new studio show featuring @stephenasmith. pic.twitter.com/cldylHjBrA
— Disney (@Disney) December 10, 2020
Nope.
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Coming to ESPN+ in 2021, Man in the Arena is a nine-part docu-series built around @TomBrady’s first-hand account of the journey to each of his nine Super Bowls. pic.twitter.com/R0kVL0jEL1
— Disney (@Disney) December 10, 2020
Lol, double nope.
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Peyton’s Places is back – & growing! Produced with @NFLFilms, Season 2 is available now on ESPN+ & Season 3 is coming Fall 2021. Plus the show is expanding to tell the stories of other sports with series hosted by @davidortiz ⚾️, @AbbyWambach ⚽️, @RondaRousey ???? & @EliManning ????. pic.twitter.com/1abs2dlcD6
— Disney (@Disney) December 10, 2020
Despite the fact that Steve McNair deserved that 2003 NFL MVP award by himself, I still find Peyton Manning to be very endearing. The guy has charisma and he’s entertaining as hell. With that said, just put this show on big ESPN by now. This thing would be the highest rated entertainment show on the network since Playmakers. But then again, what do you expect with a parent company who just let go of their highest rated radio show, The Dan Le Batard Show. Also, not sure I would’ve included Eli Manning in that graphic. I doubt even Giants fans are tuning in to watch Eli chat with anyone. Unless they have a thing for watching stale wheat bread on a TV screen for a half-hour.
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All in all, I kinda wish ESPN would allow ESPN+ to go the way of ESPN Magazine, ESPN the Phone, and the aforementioned Playmakers, and just give it up already. No one wants to drop extra coin to watch exclusive badminton matches on their mobile phone or Amazon Fire Stick. Leave us alone, already!
