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Thursday, December 12, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

Did The Ashes Of A Deceased Steelers Fan Help Them Win On Sunday?

We are only 5 weeks into this year’s NFL season and it has already proved just how crazy this sport is. During Monday Night Football, our good buddy Adam Schefter broke the news that Jon Gruden was resigning from the Raiders. Pretty shocking, sure. But then you pile that on top of Urban Meyer getting caught with a girl half his age grinding on him, the Chiefs being bad now, and now… a Steelers fan was caught spreading a family member’s ashes at a game???

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rumor has it, this is how the fan threw the ashes

Imagine sitting there enjoying your nachos and then all of a sudden you notice what appears to be dust that settled on your tortilla chips. Sure you thought the cheese was old, but you didn’t think it was THAT old. Or imagine getting a little extra breading on your chicken fingers. And here I thought Big Ben was the only dead guy at Heinz Field on Sunday.

What in the world is happening this year? Is mercury still in retrograde? If it is, what does that even mean?

“An incident occurred during the game at Heinz Field on Sunday where a fan was spreading ashes of a deceased family member in the stadium,” Steelers spokesman Burt Lauten told WTAE-TV. “Heinz Field management does not permit or condone such actions. While we respect those fans who may be interested in honoring a family member by spreading their family’s ashes inside the stadium, Heinz Field cannot accommodate those requests due to state and local regulations. We have responded to communications from our fans throughout the years that this type of action is not permissible.”

via WTAE.com

You know, I would hope Heinz Field management wouldn’t permit or condone the spreading of ashes at the stadium. Sort of makes sense.

BUT, call me crazy, did the ashes play a part in getting the win on Sunday? Before Sunday, the Steelers season was looking bleak. The national talking heads calling for Big Ben’s retirement, discussing whether Mike Tomlin was on the hot seat, and the collapse of almost everyone’s groin on the team. Now that a random fan and their deceased family member came to the game Sunday, they come out of Heinz Field with a victory? Just sayin’.

A.D.

A.D. is a Steelers season ticket holder and remembers when Wiz Khalifa was good. He hails from Pitt(sburgh), and has swam in the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans.

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