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Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

cBCS Week 7

cBCS Top 10

10. USC

This Week: vs. Arizona State
Reason: Every year the Trojans look like the best team in the country in every game except one or two. I think they’re done taking games off this year. USC wins big and help people forget about the Oregon State loss.

9. Georgia
This Week: vs. Tennessee
Reason: Georgia’s schedule doesn’t look that tough anymore with teams like Tennessee on there. The only way Tennessee has a chance of winning this game is if Georgia doesn’t show up. But even then, Tennessee will probably still find a way to lose.

8. Texas Tech 
This Week: vs.  Nebraska
Reason: Texas Tech is looking more and more legit each week. This week they are guaranteed to look better playing the Pink Shirt Defense. Just be careful not to get spit on, Graham Harrell.

7. BYU
This Week: vs. New Mexico
Reason: We’re running out of Mormon jokes. But BYU has no chance of losing this week. Enough said.

6. LSU (*)
This Week: @ Florida
Reason: An LSU defensive tackle made claims earlier this week that he wants to take Tebow out. Well, go ahead. Tebow hasn’t showed up all season for the Gators. It won’t make LSU’s chances of winning the game any higher.

5. Penn State (*)
This Week: @ Wisconsin
Reason: In their past few games, Wisconsin has been putting the “BAD” in BADGERS while Penn State has been putting the “CAN’T BE STOPPED” in NITTANY LIONS. However, Penn State has struggled pretty bad on their last two trips to Wisconsin.

4. Texas 
This Week: @ Oklahoma (in Dallas)
Reason: Texas, whatever you do don’t try and ford the Red River. Whenever I used to do that my oxen would always die. Oxen are longhorns. I think it’s a sign.

3. Alabama 
This Week: IDLE
Reason: Beating an unranked Kentucky team 17-14 at home didn’t really do it for us at Corked Bats to keep the Tide in our #2 spot. But good news for Bama fans, Auburn is terrible.

2. Missouri (*)
This Week: vs. Oklahoma State
Reason: Austin played a dynasty with Missouri on XBox 360 over the summer. The only team he lost to in the regular season was Oklahoma State at home. That leads us to believe this will be a darn good game under the lights in Missouri. But how funny would it be if Missouri won big and we got to see another irate temper tantrum from head coach, Mike Gundy! He’s a man! He’s 40! (Well, 41 now…)

1. Oklahoma (*)
This Week: vs.Texas (in Dallas)
Reason:  If OU can find a way to survive against Texas, an Oklahoma National Title may come ‘Sooner’ rather than later. Insert rim shot here.

(*) – On Upset Alert

Other Week 6 Notes
From A to Z:
  • More Roasting of Auburn. This week the SEC Powerhouse fired Tony Franklin, their offensive coordinator, who they just hired this past off season. Yeah, I’m sure he’s the reason the Auburn Tigers have looked like a powder puff football team against big programs like Vanderbilt and Mississippi State.
  • More on crappy SEC teams… the Tennessee Volunteers continue to impress. They had a really convincing 13-9 win over Northern Illinois. Wow.
  • Just like we said last week: Chase Daniel and his backup, Chase Patton, are on the cover of ESPN this week.
  • On the topic of Chase Daniel, everyone by now has heard about the pre-game warm up spitting incident with Nebraska last weekend. Huskers head coach, Bo Pelini said he reviewed the tape and didn’t see anything like that. Ok, Bo. I’m sure you would be able to see a guy spitting on a tape of pre-game warm ups. Does Nebraska even film pre-game warm ups? Who are they, the New England Patriots?
  • Has anyone checked the SEC East Standings lately? Who’s number one? Florida? Georgia? Kentucky? Tennessee? Heck, South Carolina? No. It’s the Vanderbilt Commodores. Just thought we would bring that to everyone’s attention.
  • Notre Dame has a big test in Chapel Hill this week. If they beat the #22 ranked Tar Heels on the road, we think it’s safe to say that the Irish are back.
  • Can anyone still say that Kansas is a good team after their comeback victory over Iowa State? Sure they were down 20-0 at halftime, but a GOOD team would never be down to Iowa State by that much EVER. If Kansas does the same thing against Oklahoma, THEN they are a good team.
  • At least their fans are good. Kansas is making a strong attempt to end their students’ chant of “Rip their [expletive] heads off!” from the movie The Waterboy. Obviously, Kansas has got a lot of tradition at their football games.
  • Ohio State beat Wisconsin at Camp Randall Stadium last week. Was it because of Terrelle Pryor? Was it because Beanie Wells ran for 168 and a score? No. It was because the Wisconsin Band was suspended. That’s right, all the tubas, trombones, and drum core dudes were left out of the game last Saturday. How is a team supposed to stay fired up without their fight song being played after each score? And also, that means no 5th Quarter for the Badger faithful. At least it’s the band nerds and not the football jocks getting suspended up in Madison.

Corked Bats Week 6
Underdog Picks
Zach got his first loss of the season while Austin stayed alive with his pick of Vandy over Auburn. Zach hopes to even back the score with their picks this weekend.
(Rankings are AP.)

Zach (1-1)
#5 Texas over #1 Oklahoma

Austin (2-0)
#11 Florida over #4 LSU


Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.


4 thoughts on “cBCS Week 7

  • Avatar
    October 10, 2008 at 4:12 pm

    Is it really going out on a limb when you pick a ranked team to upset another. I would understand if it was #25 knocking off #1 but 5 and 1, 11 and 4? Whoa! Look out for these guys, they’re crazy!

  • Avatar
    October 13, 2008 at 6:20 pm

    Well done on the picks this week, but Patrick is right, these weren’t really upsets. Rankings that close are pretty much toss-ups these days, especially in early October.
    I guess winning three out four championships entitles a college to film whatever they want(maybe Belichick should pull a Pete Carroll). Speaking of Nebraska, woeful Duke is the only other BCS team that hasn’t beaten a team ranked higher than 20 in the last 7 years (maybe Belichick would usurp Callahan as the worst formerly-successful-NFL-coach-turned-college-failure). Speaking of recent tradition, last week revealed Mizzou’s lack of winning tradition. When you are a winner, people hate you. Only losers can be lovable. “Mommy, the other kids don’t like me, they spit on me.” Get used to it and quit crying, or go back to 30 year win droughts in Lincoln (or 100+ years in Austin, doh!)
    Speaking of losing, is Kansas the next Rutgers? Man, talk about falling off the edge of the Earth, (Happy Columbus Day!) Rutgers has become practically irrelevant after one pretty good year.
    Speaking of relevance, Oklahoma sucks. That might be irrelevant to this specific post, but is always a relevant point in general conversation. I don’t see why who I am is relevant, but if you must know, my name is MacGruber, and I am weedy and kinda shy.

  • Avatar
    October 16, 2008 at 11:45 am

    I don’t know what “weedy” means

  • Avatar
    October 16, 2008 at 11:46 am

    Oh. Just looked it up. It means “Thin and physically weak in appearance.”

    Well, at least half of it is right.


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