Alabama Breaks Crystal Trophy Instead Of Eventually Giving It Back Probably
Last Saturday afternoon, the BCS Championship trophy, also known as the Coaches’ Trophy, was shattered and broken in what was reported as “an accident involving a player’s father tripping over carpet.”
Alabama has come out and released an official statement about the situation, and it appears as though the true motivation behind the breaking of the trophy is explained:
“Looking forward to the future of our program, we decided that breaking the trophy may be in the best interest in the future of our program, as we will probably have to vacate the trophy in a few years for some violations or something.”
Athletic Director Mal Moore continued,
“I mean, I’m not admitting we did anything, but pretty much everyone is getting in trouble for recruiting or whatnot, so… better to fall on our own sword. We can’t give back a broken trophy.”
Moore and Alabama seem to be acting in response to the trend of reprehended programs throughout the NCAA, in specific SEC football.
The trophy is valued at $30,000, which is estimated to be a fraction of the amount Alabama is going to pay in fines for recruitment violations down the road. Alabama decided to go with the “player’s father tripping over carpet” story over a couple of other stories, two of which had real life griffins stealing the trophy, one of which involved Craig Ferguson and a bomb threat, and another that had way too much to do with the hip-hop group Nappy Roots.
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This post was created by Kyle. You can follow his jokes on Twitter: @kyleayers
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