It’s postseason time in the baseball world and there are quite a few people in my life that are St. Louis Cardinals fans. They are currently down one game in their latest playoff series. I didn’t spend too much time following the St. Louis Cardinals this last year because I didn’t really think we’d see anything big come out of Pujols. When they lost yesterday, I realized that I have yet to talk about something very important in the sports world:
The After Losing Blues.
There is something that snaps inside a die hard fan when their team loses. It was the feeling that I had after LSU beat my Oregon Ducks. It’s that feeling that Tennessee Titans fans have every other Sunday. This is a feeling that Colts fans are quickly getting used to for the first time in over a decade.
In order to shake the after losing blues, there are a few steps that will help shake you or that special person in your life’s blues away.
1. Seven-layer dip in large quantities.
2. Watch the movie What About Bob.
(Nobody can stay in a bad mood watching that movie.)
3. Wearing the craziest hat to support your team.
4. Watch old *NSYNC music videos where Justin Timberlake has frosted tips.
(This works for anyone having a bad day no matter if it’s about sports or about your electricity bill being so dang high.)
5. Look at pictures of your exes that have gotten fat.
(If your ex’s have stayed good looking, this won’t help anything.)
(In fact, this will probably cause the kind of crying that is really ugly.)
(Thus, causing your “single” Facebook relationship status to stay the same.)
6. Put on a red dress.
(Red dresses aren’t just for the St. Louis fans anymore, but for anyone trying to make a St. Louis fan feel better.)
7. Do your best Bill Cosby impersonation.
8. Go to Disney World.
(Bring your own snacks though, because the snacks are so expensive.)
9. Throw candy corn at people who have fallen asleep during social functions.
(Making some one look like an idiot will always take the pain away even if only momentary)
10. Pray for the rally squirrel to be real.
(The rally squirrel is real.)
Some people will have an easier time cheering up, but this should give you a good place to start. You don’t want to walk into a situation of hostility without having a game plan. It’s important to watch the games of the important people in your life so that you know whether to start a conversation by putting on a red dress or by purchasing the cheapest airline tickets to Orlando.
Let’s hope the Cardinals go all the way.
We need this.