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Thursday, March 28, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

A Recap Of The Bachelorette From A Guy – Episode 6

Group Date: MMA Fighting!

This group date card went to Eazy, Brendan, Joe, Jordan, Spencer, Ben, Ed, and since Ed is on the date, naturally, Chasen. This is yet another date that will force feed some masculinity and testosterone down your throat whether you like it or not.

WWE Hall of Famer Amy Dumas and UFC fighter Tatiana Suarez show up to teach the guys how to physically fight. Imagine being taught how to fight by them. Actually, imagine knowing who they are and then imagine being taught by them. I bet it’s an incredible feeling!

Almost as incredible feeling as getting oil paint brushed onto your body by Tayshia.

Bachelorette GIF

They practice fighting, trash talking, and then Chris Harrison walks out holding a bell, and tells the guys they’re going to fight against each other. A.K.A., ABC clearly landed one hell of an insurance policy for this season amidst the pandemic.

So the guys are broken up into pairs and begin taking turns shirtless/pantless fighting.

Bachelorette frame grab

You probably won’t believe this, but Ed and Chasen were paired together to fight. Wild, right?! After they’re announced to fight, Chasen steps into the cage while Ed steps over to Chris Harrison to pull him aside and basically tell him that he has some sort of injury that doesn’t allow him to participate. He said he has shoulders that “chronically dislocate” and he “doesn’t want to end up in the hospital.” C’mon, Ed! We have an ambulance scene in almost every season. You could’ve been this year’s. But no, you’re too selfish worried about your “health” and “safety.” Lame.

Also, notice the injury wasn’t present during the MMA practicing, or in any of the other physical activities they’ve done this season or earlier in the episode when they showed him lifting weights. But who am I to judge?

So now that Chasen doesn’t have an opponent, Chris Harrison asked if anyone else wanted to step up. العب واربح المال الحقيقي And from the top rope… err, the top of the steel fencing, jumped Noah, the mustache guy from Oklahoma. So he fought Chasen, in what seemed like a pretty physical grapple. But ultimately Chasen was crowned the jampion.

Bachelorette frame grab

But since Noah stepped up – and wasn’t originally on the group date – Tayshia invited him to the group date cocktail party. And since he looks like a bartender from Brooklyn, Noah accepted the invite. This did not make the other guys happy.

Group Date Cocktail Party

So Noah makes solid use of his cocktail party invite and pulls Tayshia aside to kiss her, but he can tell she wasn’t fully into it and he asks if its because of his mustache. “It’s not that I don’t like it,” she says. “But I wonder what you look like without that thing?” As a happily married man, I can tell you that’s code for: she hates it.

The party keeps going. The cocktails keep getting sipped. And Noah makes a b-line back to his room. العاب للايفون Why? To get his weirdly shaped electric razor, of course.

Bachelorette frame grab

This feels like a good time to tell you that if you want to get 20% OFF and. FREE SHIPPING at MANSCAPED (for great men’s grooming. gifts), use promo code “korked” at checkout or visit this link. Seriously, ladies, get your guy some grooming products for Christmas – the have the BEST razors.

So Tayshia shaves his lip caterpillar, and seems to oddly enjoy it. And at the end of the cocktail party, gives Noah the rose. This definitely went over well with the guys who were originally invited on the group date.

Bachelorette GIF

SIKE! It didn’t!

And that’s where the episode ends.

Questions Of The Week

Each week, I answer the same questions. These are those questions.

Who Won The Episode?

Chasen. I know, I know. This is a wild take. But for him to face adversity early, overcome it, and still get the rose? Plus, next to Ed, he looked pretty good in my opinion. He tried to apologize and be the bigger man (and not just literally), so Chasen – despite the spelling of his name – is ok in my book.

Who Should’ve Gotten A Rose?

I honestly don’t know the guys names – so the guys who didn’t get roses this week, I didn’t really know. So I wasn’t as sad when they bounced. That will change as the season gets deeper.

Who Gets My Rose This Week?

Kenny.

I know he was my answer to this question last week. But I like Kenny. And not just because I’ve seen his boy band perform… twice.

Did Nick Viall Make A Cameo This Week?

No, but we got Ashley I., Jared Haibon, and Wells Adams. I love Wells (he got his professional start in Nashville radio like me, and he too was on my podcast. Cool dude.), but with that said, I hope ABC doesn’t overuse him for things like this. I don’t want him to be the next Nick Viall.

Predictions For Next Week Based On The Trailer?

More dude drama. And I’m here for it. Unfortunately, I feel like none of these guys will get physical. They’re all too much into their looks. So we’ll just get a bunch of dumb arguments between them – like we did this week from Ed.

Thanks for reading!

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin

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