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Thursday, March 28, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

A Recap of The Bachelor From A Guy – Hometowns

Kelsey’s Hometown

Des Moines, Iowa

Ah, beautiful Iowa. If you looked closely in the background of this date, you could see people scrambling around still trying to figure out Caucus results.

And of course, Kelsey’s date with Peter starts out with the two of them making alcohol. She took him to a winery where the two of them stomped grapes. Is it just me or is the only thing you think about when seeing people stomp grapes is this video?

This is one of the first viral videos I can remember. The noises she makes at the end!!

After stomping grapes, which is equal parts perfect for a girl like Kelsey who loves alcohol and throwing temper tantrums, they got to sample some wine, and honestly, I haven’t seen Kelsey this excited since Tammy got sent home. After Kelsey got wine eyes from sampling, the two of them then bottled their own wine and were tasked with giving it a name.

“What should we call out bottle of wine?” Peter asked. Kelsey said she’s let Peter come up with a name. Peter says, “Our bottles going to be called just ‘Wine,'” as if we need any more reason as to how bad this guy is at making decisions.

According to the list he wrote above, Hannah Ann apparently has a name for every dress she’s worn, but Peter can’t muster up a single name for a bottle of wine? Kels, I hate to break this to you, but this is a glimpse into your future with this man. Don’t be surprised when you two have your first baby and he wants to name it “Baby.”

The Bachelor Peter Weber and Kelsey drink wine on their hometown date

After the brilliant naming session, Kelsey decided to tell Peter, “I can honestly say that I am In love with you.” Not sure if that was Kelsey speaking or the Wine wine speaking.

That night, Peter meets Kelsey’s family where they enjoy some crab rangoon, which in the middle of Iowa – a minimum fifteen hour drive to the nearest coastline – I can only imagine is some of the freshest crab rangoon on earth. Unless of course they’re one of those families that uses imitation crab. Peter freaks out like a kid who just learned about the Lucky Charms cereal made of only the marshmallows.

Kelsey’s mom then pulls Peter aside and asks him pointed questions about whether or not he’s seen her dramatic side yet. Oh trust me, Mrs. Kelsey’s mom, we have. Then she makes a point to tell Peter that “When she loves, she loves like no other.” Again, we know. We saw her with the champagne.

The date ends with the two of them sitting out on a wicker bench on the patio in front of the house, where Peter tells her that his heart “is definitely falling.”

Click the right arrow to advance to Madison’s Hometown…

Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin

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