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Friday, March 29, 2024

Korked Bats

That Funny Sports Blog

17 Years Ago Today, Sammy Sosa Got Busted For Corking His Bat, What Happens Next Will Shock You

Hold up. You mean to tell me Sammy Sosa cheated?

Third World Skeptical Kid Meme Generator - Imgflip

Yes.

Sammy’s defense?

SOURCE“I use that bat for batting practice,” Sosa said at the time. “It’s something that I take the blame for. It’s a mistake, I know that. I feel sorry. I just apologize to everybody that are embarrassed.”

I get the excuse, but sure it really works. “Honey, I didn’t cheat on you! I use my side piece for batting practice!” He maybe should’ve tried it for the steroid scandal though. “I only used anabolic steroids for batting practice!”

I actually like Sammy Sosa a lot. Watching him sprint from dugout to right field still gets my juices flowing. And then him doing it while holding a mini-American flag in his first game post-9/11. I nearly fainted with pride. But there’s no denying Sammy has had quite the rollercoaster of a career and/or life.

You can have your 10-part Michael Jordan/Chicago Bulls documentary. Give me a 10-part Sammy Sosa documentary.

Episode 1: His Time On The Southside (White Sox days)

Episode 2: His Move North To Wrigleyville (Chicago Cubs)

Episode 3: The Summer of 1998 (Home Run Chase)*

(*-an entire episode could be spent on his 20 home runs in the month of June alone.)

Episode 4: Getting Caught With A Corked Bat

Episode 5: That Awkward Season With The Orioles / Bookending His Career In Texas

Episode 6: His Retirement And Where The Hell He Went For Like Five Years

Episode 7: Black Sammy

Episode 8: White Sammy

Episode 9: Pink Sammy

Episode 10: Why He Only Takes Weird Photos Now

I’m fascinated with this man. And you can’t tell me you’re not either. Like what does he do in a day. What’s his routine? Other than turning into a bat and sucking people’s blood.

Regardless, 17 years ago today is the day he got busted for his corked bat. Here’s a fun tidbit. A lot of people think this site was started and/or named after this incident. It wasn’t. I wish we had a cool story or reason why this site is named Korked Bats, but we don’t. I can tell you this though. The site started out as corked-bats.blogspot.com, but we hated saying corked hyphen bats, and korked was available, so we made the change. Again, I wish I had a cooler story, but that’s just facts.

All in all, June 3rd, 2003 isn’t just a day where Sammy Sosa’s bat broke. I’m pretty sure it’s a day that broke Sammy Sosa. Because ever since he’s been weird. Then again, what more should you expect from an adult male who goes by Sammy. All I’ll say is to wherever Slammin’ Sammy is today, I hope he’s resting peacefully in his home.

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Austin

Austin hosts a country music morning radio show in Chicago after nearly a decade in sports talk radio (The Jim Rome Show, Steve Gorman SPORTS!) Colin Cowherd and Smash Mouth follow him on Twitter and he wears pants every day.

Austin

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